Troy & Arin + Stockton & Logan

Random Ranting

2012-01-19T00:15:00.002-07:00

I have been feeling a little unmotivated lately. Well, pretty much hopeless, as a matter of fact. I have been thinking alot about where I am in my life, the road that led me here, and where it is I really want to be. Let me first clarify that I love my family. I love them so much that it literally hurts sometimes. I have a husband that, even though life and relationships are hard, I know we were supposed to end up on this journey together. I have 2 boys that if I could freeze them in time and re-live the same day with them over and over again, I would be happy until the end of time. But sometimes I feel like they are all I have. Now, I know what you are thinking, "Of course you have so much more, you have a beautiful home, great friends, financial security, and the knowledge that you are a Beloved Daughter of Heavenly Father, blah, blah, blah...." I can recognize all of these things and I get it that that should all be enough. I should be happy that I have "won" this game of life that destiny set me up to fail at, but lately what I always considered to be a success has felt more like a failure.

I didn't grow up feeling like I had limitless potential to succeed in life. Most of my adolescent life I felt like I would be a considered a success if I made it through my teenage years without getting pregnant, ending up addicted to drugs, and living in a trailer the rest of my life. The guidance that I did receive from family influences, church leaders, and outside examples made me believe that my best route was to grow up, find a good guy, get married, have children, buy a nice house, make money, and live happily ever after. I never realized that I could actually do whatever it is was that I WANTED to do. I could join the Peace Corp and serve others all over the world for years before even thinking about getting married. My husband and I could bypass getting a "good" job, buying a house, and joining the same rat race as the rest of the world and live all over the world for free on farming communities where we learn all the skills necessary to be self-sustaining while being enriched by the people we come in contact with. I could go to school, learn about something I ENJOY, and actually get paid to do it! The only thing I ever knew that I wanted to do and believed that I would actually be good at it was be a Mother. I am doing that and I LOVE it, but I realize that there is so much more that I could be doing and so much about my life that I could change to make it my own dream come true. I just feel like I am in too deep in this life that we have created for ourselves that doing what we actually WANT to be doing is just too hopeless. Or maybe I am just not willing to give up who I am to become who I want to be and I just need someone to blame for that. Maybe I should just be content with what I have achieved in life, do what I can to improve it, and teach my boys that they really can do whatever it is they want, they can be whoever they want to be and their success will be my success. Hopefully if I can successfully teach them that message, that will fill up this nagging sense of failure inside of me. Or maybe, one day, I will fill it up myself by discovering my place in the world, figuring out something I am actually good at it that will inspire or help those around me and that will make me feel content and valuable. But not tomorrow. Thursdays are floor cleaning days, I won't have time for anything else.

Happy Halloween (for my Mom)

2011-12-08T13:51:00.000-07:00

My mom has been asking me to post some Halloween pictures for quite sometime so I thought I better do it before posting Christmas pictures gets here. Our original plan for Halloween was this adorable sock monkey costume for Logan and we borrowed a dragon costume for Stockton. However...

....due to a last minute Woody costume that my sister gave Stockton a few days before Halloween, we did a last minute switch over to this...

I didnt do a very good job of getting a picture of them together. It turns out trying to get a picture of them at the end of the night when all they want to do is tear into their loot isn't the best timing. Then you just end up with pictures like this. (And these are the GOOD ones)

Here is Stockton and his buddies out Trick-or-Treating. Is it just me, or does Stockton look tiny next to these two? And he is the OLDEST of the group!

Family Pics 2011

2011-10-27T21:31:00.000-06:00

I am sure all of my 10 readers have already seen our pics on Facebook, but I needed to document them since I just LOVE all of them so much!! Here they are...

My 1 year old baby

2011-09-30T22:33:00.000-06:00

August 25, 2011

1 month old

2 months old

3 months old

4 months old

5 months old

6 months old

7 months old

8 months old

9 months old

10 months old

11 months old

1 year old

I can't believe Logan's first year is already over. The more I tried to savor every minute of my baby boy, the faster it seemed to go. When I close my eyes and think of Logan at 1 year old, these are the things I want to remember....

His big toothy grin that he gives away so freely, especially when he knows he is being naughty.
The way he puckers his lips and scrunches his eyes when he talks to you so seriously and says "Goog, goog". And the way he points his little finger when he is trying to show you something he wants.
Watching him run away smiling or laughing when he knows its time to get dressed, change his diaper, or go to bed.
Having to pin him down on the floor with one of my legs so I can change his diaper since he doesn't understand the concept of holding still.
His independent eating. He doesnt like to be fed, he has to do things himself. But since he hasn't mastered his spoon and fork yet, we have to get the food on it and put it down on the tray for him to pick up. If you try and hand the fork directly to him, he wont take it. He does that with alot of things. He won't take things directly from my hand, I have to set it down in front of him and then he will pick it up.
The way he has mastered the art of dodging you while trying to wipe his face or nose. It is next to impossible to get his face cleaned, so don't jug me that it is always dirty!!
The way he will come over and sit in mine or Troy's lap for a second while he is playing just to check in and then he goes right back to playing.
The way he growls like a little Gremlin when he plays, mostly with his trucks or animals.
His love for playing in the bathroom. Whether it is climbing up the step stool and playing in the sink or taking advantage of us forgetting to close the toilet lid.
His wispy/curly hair sticking out behind his ears.
Him learning at such a young age how to antagonize his older brother. Whether it is rough-housing or taking something of Stockton's and turning and running while Stockton chases him crying, he is already a pro.
The way he waves bye-bye by just moving his wrist up and down. It is especially cute when he randomly does it to strangers without being provoked.
Him always having bruises on his head from either falling down or running into things b/c he is so top heavy with his big noggin.
The way he hits you with toys. Even though he is a little stinker when he does it, the naughty grin that follows is just priceless. It was especially funny when he beat Daddy up with the drumstick.
The way he wont let us hold him to put him to sleep. We just put him in his crib and he literally moves constantly until he falls asleep. Sometimes, and I repeat, SOMETIMES, he will let us cuddle him a little before he put him in his crib. This usually involves him being sweet, looking up at us and then sticking his fingers in our mouth and stabbing our gums with his razor sharp finger nails.
Putting us through 3 hours of torture every Sunday at church because he doesn't know how to be still for more than 3 seconds.
His chubby, little bow-legs and chunky butt.
The way he rests his head on my chest when I get him out of his bed in the morning.
His no-fear, do anything attitude.
The way he backs down the driveway to the street grinning at me because he knows he is going to get in trouble.
His long, think eyelashes and the color of his green eyes that are exactly like his Daddy's.
The way he walks in place when he is throwing a fit and then plops himself down on the ground.
And the way he will come and lay on you when you are in the floor with him to give you loves.

I don't ever want to forget the light that I have seen in him from the very first second I met him and I just don't ever want to forget the way I feel everyday when I get to see this face...

A new hobby????

2011-08-14T10:15:00.002-06:00

I tried my hand at fondant cake decorating this weekend for my awesome friend, Sarah's, birthday. She loves owls and I was inspired by a cake my friend at Audzipan Anthology made. I am pretty proud of my first attempt and am anxious to do something fun for Logan's birthday in a couple of weeks. What do you think??

Side note: I made the fondant myself. It was super easy and yummy! Check out the Audzipan Anthology for the recipe I used. :)

State of Denial

2011-08-04T22:58:00.002-06:00

I haven't been able to believe that Logan's 1st birthday is just a couple weeks away until I took this picture of him today. My baby goggles finally came off and I was able to see how grown up he actually is. It makes my heart sad to think of him of a blossoming toddler instead of my precious baby.

(Don't you love the skid marks on his face and his goose egg/bruise on his forehead? Typical Logan.)

His latest updates:

He loves anything that has wheels that he can drive around and make car noises. Seriously, if he even sees a picture of a car or truck, he starts with his growling sounds.
He is learning how to work the sympathy system and show a little jealousy. If Stockton is crying to me, he will run over and squeeze himself between us into my lap or he will immediately start crying and run over to be held.
He is still in GO!GO!GO! mode at all times. He has to be constantly moving and doing something. He doesnt know the definition of sitting still.
He is learning how to be a grumpy pants and has no problem showing his bad attitude at anytime of the day.
He is becoming much more affectionate. He likes it when I just sit in the floor while he plays so he can come over every 2 mintues, crawl in my lap, give me a hug, and sit there for about 30 seconds before he is back to business with his toys.
He somehow already knows how to annoy his brother and is already learning to some self defense wrestling moves. He will get on his hands with his butt in the air and ram into Stockton with his head. I will admit, Stockton deserves it most of the time.
He has mastered the art of running away from me laughing when he knows it is time to either get dressed or get his diaper changed.

His birthday is sure creeping up fast, I better get into gear planning something. I know he doesnt really need a big party, but I feel like if I dont at least do something similar to what we did for Stockton's then I will be a horrible mother and will further damage his fragile ego as the 2nd child. So if anyone has any ideas, let me know. Also, if you know how to make a truck cake, send me some tips! :)

Potty Training and Prayers

2011-07-21T21:31:00.000-06:00

I am not in the mood to make a detailed post, but I just wanted to document that after 2 1/2 days of intensive training, Stockton is officially potty trained!! Thanks to some good advice, it was alot easier than I anticipated. It almost makes me wish I would have done it sooner. Maybe not. I also thought is was interesting that Stockton is exactly 2 1/2 years old today. Happy kind-of Birthday, Stockton! :)

Oh yeah, and he also said the prayer at dinner tonight for the very first time. I am looking forward to many years of listening to children's prayers. So cute.

Time for some documenting

2011-07-08T23:31:00.001-06:00

This past week I have been consumed with the realization that Stockton and Logan are growing everyday. And not only are they growing, but they are doing it very quickly. Much faster than I would really like. There is so much about them that I don't want to forget and so much that I wish would never change. So I figured I better write some stuff down before I blink and they are teenagers. Here goes:

Logan:

I worry everyday about what is in store for me the older he gets. (Prepare yourselves for a cheesy, only-a-mother-would-understand comment) From the time he was born I saw a light in him that I didn't see in Stockton. It was a kindness and a lightheartedness in his eyes that I really can't describe. I still see it in him everyday, but he is just so full of energy that I don't know how he will ever be contained. He has been walking for about the past month (since 9 1/2 months) and is already a pro. He rarely even crawls anymore, he would much rather walk. He can stand up from a sitting position, and doesn't need to pull himself up on anything. He has also mastered going up the stairs, hasnt figured out how to go down yet, but he can fly up, that's for sure. It is weird for me to see such a little guy walking, but at the same time, I wouldn't expect anything different from him.
He is the happiest, most go-lucky baby in the world...as long as he is getting what he wants. As soon as that changes, he goes from 0 to 60 in about 2 seconds. He knows how to be stubborn and he knows how to throw a fit. Watch out world, we have got one more strong-willed boy coming your way.
His hands are still out of control. He loves grabbing everything he possibly can and sticking his hands in peoples' mouths and faces. I think he could potentially grow up to be a thief b/c he is so fast and can grab anything that you think is out of his reach. Everyday he does at least one walk-by grab. I will be holding him, walking through the house and will notice that he carrying some object that there is no possible way he could have grabbed without me noticing.
He is starting to enjoy reading. And when I say this I mean that he will actually let me open a book and turn it 2-3 pages before he becomes Godzilla and wants to destroy it. He mostly enjoys books with pictures of animals or babies. I am learning that if I read him books that I can interact with him by touching him or making funny noises, then I have a better chance of getting through those. This may seem normal for a 10 month old baby, but Stockton would sit still and let me read to him as long I wanted from the time he was born. So to me, it is a little frustrating. Reading is my "Paranoid Mother" issue. I don't buy into all of the Parenting Guides that try and convince you that if you dont do things a certain way then your baby will not turn out normal, but somewhere along the way I got it into my head that if I dont read to my kids at least 15 minutes a day then they will grow up with no imagination, have ADD and not do very well in school. I am paranoid, I know, but as far as I am concerned reading to them everyday will only have positive affects on them so I am OK with being OCD about it. Anyways, back to Logan...
He loves to growl. My sister seems to think he is a Gremlin. I am confident that he isn't, but not confident enough to feed him after midnight. He mostly growls when he wants something from you, when he is looking at pictures of animals, and when he is driving his trucks around. And sometimes just when he is walking around the house. This is what worries me about feeding him after midnight.
He has 6 teeth so far. Both sets of front and bottom middles and the 2 right beside the middles on top. He has started grinding them together and he makes the cutest face when he does it.
He is starting to get a little more cuddly. He still wont let me hold him until he goes to sleep, but he at least rests his head on my chest and lets me sway with him for a couple minutes before I put him in his bed. Those are the times I wish I could hold him forever.
Finally, he is a total Daddy's boy. When Troy is home he pretty much wants nothing to do with anyone or anything else. If me and Troy are in the same room, he goes to Troy over me every time. Anytime Troy is in the floor, Logan will walk over and either nuzzle him with his head or sit with his back up against Troy and just lay on him. It is really sweet. Stockton is such a Momma's boy, I am glad that Troy has a little buddy.

Stockton:

He is getting so grown up and smarter everyday. It is crazy to see him put his own thoughts together instead of just allowing us to control everything he says and does. He is just so aware and interested in everything going on around him and is starting to have his own random thoughts. This morning at breakfast he just pipes up and says, "Dis tastes good, Mommy." And then again at lunch. I guess he didn't think too highly of our dinner because I didn't get a compliment for that. He likes to ask "Wha Dat?" and when I tell him he says, "Oh". The other day at the park he brought me a flower and said, "Mommy have." That one brought a tear to my eye. One night we were going to bed and he chose his bedtime book, but I told him it was brother's turn for a book first and for him to sit on the floor and read his book until it was his turn and he said "O-tay Mommy, I read it" and he sat down on his floor and turned the pages while talking jibberish to himself and pointing at the pictures.
He is talking up a storm these days. His vocabulary is growing everyday and he will pretty much repeat anything that we want him to say. His speech therapist wants us to start working on his pronunciation now that his vocabulary is getting so big. He was eating some graham cracker bunnies the other day and he asked for more "Nunnies". I told him they were Bunnies, not Nunnies. I had him repeat the "B" sound for me and then told him to say "Bu-Bu-Bu-Bunnies" and he said, "Bu-Bu-Bu-Nunnies!" He was so proud of himself.
He loves doing puzzles. He is so good at it, too. He is already doing the 36 piece ones. He would do puzzles all day if I didnt get burnt out on them so fast. Every time he gets a piece together he gets so excited and says, "I did it!" I thought I would join in on the excitement so when I got a piece together I said, "I did it!" and he followed up with "Mommy, I did it, too!"
He got his mother's scared gene and he is becoming more and more afraid of the dark. Even if it is daylight outside, but the blinds are closed in a room, he wont go in there unless I go in and open up the window first. Even though I know he is scared he tries to say so matter-of-factly, "Mommy dark" so I will go in first. At least he tries to be brave.
Toy Story and Thomas the Train have taken the backseat to Go! Diego! Go! For the time being, at least. He must ask at least 20 times a day to watch it. Although he doesnt just ask, he throws his hands in the air and says, "Watch Diedo!" He is just so enthusiastic about it that it is hard to not be as excited about him watching it as he is. It seems like lately he has been watching too much it, but it could be worse, right?
He LOVES his "Naan-Naan". His cousin Emily is probably his 2nd most favorite person in the world right behind Mommy. Anytime she is around, the world around him ceases to exist and she is the only thing that matters. He wants nothing to do with me or Troy and wants her to do everything for him. The funny thing is that he calls her "Naan-Naan". My name has always been Dawn-Dawn in my family because my sister couldnt say my name when we were little so somehow the name Dawn-Dawn was born. (My middle name is Dawn) We never told Stockton to call Emily Dawn-Dawn, he just picked up on it from hearing her say it so frequently. That is what is so funny. Not so much anymore, but it seems like anytime Emily was around, there was a broken record playing my name over and over and over again.

Stockton & Logan:

They are both getting really good at pestering each other already. Stockton thinks he can take any toy away from Logan as long as he gives him a "replacement" toy when he swipes it. And Logan thinks he can just go take whatever he wants from Stockton because, well...he's stronger and almost bigger. Plus Logan is already learning how to push Stockton's buttons to get a reaction out of him. Logan will go do something to Stockton, Stockton will throw a fit, and Logan will just laugh like that is exactly what he was trying to do. Shouldn't it be the other way around?? Logan is too little for this.
Even though they do things to annoy each other, they are getting really good at playing with each other. They already know how to rough-house each other and even though I think Logan is too little play the way they play most of the time, he just laughs and laughs and laughs so I am learning to just turn my head and let them do their thing. It is funny to watch them feed off of each other. Stockton will do something silly or entertaining and Logan will just bust a gut, so then Stockton will start laughing and they will both just laugh as hard as they can. It was so precious to have Stockton all to ourselves and be able to play and laugh with him, but it is so much more satisfying to hear 2 little boys laughing together. I hope they will always love each other as much as they do right now.

My Scariest Moment, So Far.

2011-06-22T23:13:00.001-06:00

We thought we lost Stockton at the park last night. No seriously, for about 2 minutes, we really thought he was gone. It was hands down the most terrifying 2 minutes of my life. Even though he wasnt actually lost, I havent been able to shake the panic out of mind. We were attending a BBQ with a pretty big group of people at a park we were unfamiliar with. After dinner, all the adults were hanging out eating a little more while the kids played on the playground about 25-30 yards away. After 10-15 minutes, I glance over and dont see Stockton's green shirt so I decided to stroll over just to check on him. As I am walking over, I still dont see him. I get to the playground, still dont see him. I start to get a little nervous, so I check in all the tunnels, still no Stockton. I decide to scan the perimeter of playground and when I dont see him, I start to get a little nervous. I yell back to Troy that he isnt on the playground and to get up and start looking for him. I continue to walk past the playground to see if maybe he went to play in the dirt of the BMX track even though I know it is not in Stockton's nature to wonder. When I see that he is not on the outskirts of the track, I got very nervous, and as Troy put it, my Mommy radar went off in full force. I am starting to panic and yell back at Troy to do something!!! At this point, the rest of the adults have realized what is going on and immediately start to blanket the entire area. It is amazing how just seeing this play out a million different scenarios can play through your mind in a matter of 10 seconds. For example, I imagined that someone had him in the bathroom, doing who knows what, and that Troy, along with the 10 other men with us, were going to find him and literally beat the living daylights out of the pervert that would do such a thing. Or that Stockton has wondered near the busy street and someone just pulled over and picked him up and was who knows where, doing who knows what. In an instant I felt 100% helpless and terrified. By this time, I have entered Stage 1 of Arin's Meltdown Mode. I start to run across the street to see if, by the grace of God, he had merely wandered over to check out the neighboring park. My friend, Sara, followed and just as she was about to call 911, I hear them all yelling that they have him. The relief I felt in that instant is indescribable. The tears stopped fairly quickly, but I swear my heart is still beating faster than it should be and my hands are literally shaking while I type this.

It turns out he was on the playground the entire time. The sneaky little bugger. I dont know how all of us missed him. And while he was, in reality, no danger whatsoever, that doesnt make the experience I had any less real. You can roll your eyes and call me dramatic, but for about 5 minutes, I was CERTAIN my 2-year old was gone and I was CERTAIN someone had taken him and I dont ever want to re-live that experience again. I can empathize on a whole new level with parents who actually really do have to live that nightmare. Me and Troy both agreed that if something like that really did happen, neither us would know what to do with ourselves. I honestly think I would be suicidal. Now I dont want want this to be some cheesy post about "hug your kids a little tighter" and I am not trying to get any special attention, I really don't know what I want this post to be. I guess I just wanted to document what happened and maybe hope that it helps me to stop being so freaked out by it. It has definitely been a good reminder to me just how precious he is and how devastating it would be if something were to happen to him or Logan, I can't even think about it....

Even on my worst day.

2011-06-09T22:42:00.001-06:00

Today has been one of those days where you wonder how, as a Mother, you maintain a normal level of sanity day in and day out. The boys were both especially whiny. Stockton was extra rough with his baby brother and Logan just fussed and cried for no good reason. Well, I am sure he had a reason, I just didnt know what the heck it was. And to make matters worse, I was not in the best of moods.

Unrelated to the annoyances of the day, my cousin has been talking about coming to Idaho for a quick vacation. She called me today to talk about things to do here and dates that would be good to come and all of that fun stuff. I don't know about you, but for some reason when I get on the phone it seems like all hell breaks loose and the boys think it is a red flag to run wild and do whatever they want. This particular cousin has no shame admitting that she isn't a big fan of kids, in general, and has no desire to have children of her own. After about the 3rd time yelling at Stockton to get off of his brother I joked that maybe she was on to something not having any kids. After a few comments back and forth about the so called "joy" that comes with having children, we both agreed that is was good that she knew ahead of time that it was not something that she wanted to do, rather than regretting it after it was already too late.

I have been thinking about that brief part of our conversation all night. I wish more women were smart enough to recognize that ahead of time, rather than just starting a family out of obligation, pressure, or stupidity. After having children of my own, there are few things that make me more sad than thinking of children who aren't wanted, either before they were conceived or after they were born. I seriously get sick to my stomach, want to throw up sad when I think about all the children who don't get the love and attention that they deserve because they aren't wanted. I don't mean to say that if my cousin ever had children that she wouldn't be a great mother, or that she wouldn't love and want her children. Our conversation merely reminded how much I WANT to be a Mother. How much I want to be Stockton and Logan's Mother. Even on my worst day.

The End of an Era

2011-05-18T23:08:00.001-06:00

I really can't believe it, but Stockton is growing up. He may not be getting any bigger, but he is changing. And the more I realize it the sadder and sadder I get. He is talking up a storm, picking up new words everyday and learning how to form 3-4 word sentences. The most significant of these new words is "Tay" (Okay). It first started when I would ask if he was OK and he would say "Tay", which has since turned into "I tay" (I'm Okay). Then he started to use it to acknowledge something I say like, "Stockton, I am going to take a shower, I will be in the bathroom if you need me, OK?" To which he would respond, "Tay". And now for the development that makes me sad: he says "Tay" when he means "Yes". For anyone who knows Stockton very well, knows about his "Yes" chuckle. He has never actually spoken the word "yes". Instead he would always just...I dont even know how to describe it other than a chuckle. The replacement of this chuckle with the word "Tay" is for some reason very hard for me to accept. Its almost like it means I am saying goodbye to Stockton the baby and hello to Stockton the little boy. Or maybe I have already done that, his chuckle was just the last thing I was holding on to. Either way, it makes this Mommy very sad.

His other most noteworthy new phrase is "No Way". Everything the last couple days has been, "No Way."

Stockton, let's get dressed. No Way.

Stockton, are you ready for your nap? No Way.

Stockton, let's bless the food. No Way.

Stockton, do you want to take a bath? No Way.

I am sure I will get tired of this one, but for now it's just cute. And speaking of cute, his trademark phrase for the last month or so still makes my heart smile everytime I hear it, "Dee-Doo, Mommy." (Thank you, Mommy) EVERYTHING I do for him is followed up with a "Dee-Doo, Mommy". Even when I put him in his bed, I get the sweetest "Dee-Doo, Mommy" you will ever hear. I like to tell myself that is his way of saying, I Love You. Even if its not, that's the message I get.

The Woes of Motherhood

2011-05-06T16:24:00.000-06:00

Everyday I am sure I think to myself, "If I didn't have kids, I could actually _________." Normally the thought is finished with things like:

-"blow dry my hair and do my makeup without a baby trying to crawl up my legs and a toddler putting on blush and lips gloss"
-"enjoy not getting crumbs stuck to the bottom of my feet while walking through the kitchen"
-"start a task and finish it without getting interrupted 50 times"
-"sit down and eat a meal while it is still hot"
-"run errands without having to load and unload in the car 100 times, chase and entertain kids, and change poopy diapers in nasty bathrooms"

Lately, with the anticipation of the new X-Men movie and the final chapter of the Harry Potter saga reaching an all time high, all this thought is finished with is, "sit down and do nothing all day but have a movie marathon". I can't even imagine being able to sit down and watch 7 Harry Potters back to back with no interruptions. The mere thought of it is unfathomable to me. Maybe if I start now I could squeeze in 4 X-Men movies before June 3 and another 7 Harry Potter's before mid-July. It would take some hard work and dedication, but maybe, just maybe I could do it. And if I am really lucky, I could maybe even find someone with enough passion as my friend, Bekah, to go to the midnight showings with me. I can dream, can't I?

A good one

2011-05-06T15:34:00.001-06:00

My sister just posted this on her blog and it really made me think about things. I thought it was worth sharing. Enjoy. :)

Vanderlinden Clan: present to past

Our first camping trip of the season

2011-05-05T21:12:00.001-06:00

It wasn't the best weekend to have our first camping trip, it was cold and rainy the entire weekend until, of course, we started packing up to go home. And did I mention that the only morning Troy DIDN'T go hunting was the morning he could have had a shot at a turkey? Oh well, the weekend had its good moments. Our niece and her boyfriend got engaged, YAY! Congrats to Kevin & Marissa! :)

Here are some pics from the weekend.

We did see a baby bear cub. He wondered into our camp. If you look very closely at this picture, you can see him.

The happy couple taking their engagement pictures.

April Update

2011-04-26T23:06:00.000-06:00

April has proved to be a pretty good month for us. Here is the update:

Logan is getting cuter and more fun everyday. He is so busy and into everything, but he is just so happy all the time that you can't help but fall in love with him every time you look at him. I wont be surprised if he is walking soon b/c he has mastered pulling himself up on anything he possibly can.

He discovered that underneath his bed is a pretty fun place to play and crawls under any chance he gets.

Our beautiful niece, Chantal, got married to an awesome guy. Thanks to some great friends, we were able to enjoy their classy and beautiful wedding kid-free.

While Troy and I were shakin' our booties on the dance floor, Stockton was enjoying some time with his best buds, Avery and Rhett. I think these 3 are going to cause a good amount of trouble in their day.

...and Logan got his first lesson is cross dressing. I am sorry Logan, I won't forget your jacket ever again.

What we thought was going to be an uneventful Easter weekend actually turned out to be pretty jam-packed. Stockton got to do an egg hunt Friday, Saturday, and Sunday. While no egg hunt could replace a day of hunting with his cousins, we had some good substitutions.

On Friday, our neighborhood put on a little hunt. It was nice for Stockton's first hunt because they had a small section reserved just for 1 and 2 year olds. He was able to get the idea of what he was doing without having to fight older kids for eggs. I didnt tell him there was candy in the eggs until AFTER the hunt was over. Otherwise, he wouldnt have gotten too far.

On Saturday, we did another little hunt with Stockton's friend, Avery. She is just the sweetest little girl. I hope Stockton grows a little so she will want to stay his girlfriend. No girl wants a boyfriend that is shorter than she is, right?

On Sunday we had dinner at Troy's mom's house with some of his family. Stockton, of course, got to hunt eggs again.

This is my attempt to get a good "brothers" picture. Not much of a success, but I tried.

And, as if I have not eaten enough Easter candy already, we got a package in the mail from my Mom today with lots of Easter goodies. Stockton was really excited to see more candy. His Weema sure does a good job of spoiling him, even from far away. Thanks WeeMa!

Self Re-Discovery

2011-04-14T23:58:00.002-06:00

Its been almost a year since we moved to Idaho. I know, can you believe it? The year has had its share of ups and downs as anyone would expect after moving away from your family, having a second baby, and starting a new life in a new place. Recently I have been reflecting a lot on these changes and trying to realize why, despite turning our lives upside down, I feel happier than I have been in a LONG time. Two things in particular really got me thinking lately, one was a talk with my sister about how much I am growing to like Idaho and why, and the other was looking at a "friends" Facebook profile.

While my sister was visiting last week, she asked me how I felt about us moving and how things were going. I was telling her that I feel more like myself than I have in a long time. The word I kept coming back to over and over was that I just feel so FREE. I just feel like I am more able to be myself here, but I couldn't really pinpoint specifically WHY. That leads me to the Facebook profile...I was looking through my "friends" recent pictures they posted and everything about them was just so...perfect...a little too perfect. Almost freaky perfect. It got me thinking about how my life from the outside could never look like those pictures, not even if I tried my very hardest on my very best day. Everything thing about them was beautiful, the way their house was decorated. To say "the way their house was decorated" just scratches the surface, I mean every room was perfectly tidy with every inch meticulously decorated and themed, there were no dirty dishes or junk piles. The backyard was perfectly groomed with a fancy swing set and green grass. Everything down to the front porch pillows, that's right, even the front porch pillows whispered perfection. The kids were perfectly groomed in every picture with coordinating clothes and equally coordinating accessories. The mother was beautiful, skinny and perfect only months after having had a baby; perfect makeup and styled hair. The photographs themselves were crystal clear and professional looking like they had been taken with one of those fancy $1000 cameras. After looking through all of the pictures, instead of feeling bad about myself and a little jealous of their life like I would have in the past, I just felt exhausted. And I just wondered what is her life really like? How much time and energy and work does it take everyday for her life to be that perfect? And, is having that perfection everyday what really makes her happy? If it is, then that's great, really it is. We should all do what brings us joy and makes us happy each day. But that life is not it for me. And I realized that moving to Idaho has helped me be OK with that.

I don't feel the pressure anymore to keep up on all the latest and greatest home decorating/crafting ideas and hobbies. Like how to create the perfect Easter centerpiece for your table like so and so, how to make a wreath out of streamers like so and so, how to make cupcake wrappers like so and so, and blah blah blah. The truth is, my house will never look like it does on "that blog", I don't have the desire or the money. And guess what, I dont think my house is so out of style, it might not be hip, but its comfortable.

I don't feel the pressure anymore to make friends with a certain group in our ward or neighborhood. The truth is, if I am myself, not trying to fit in, then my group of friends, the ones that really like me for me, will naturally form itself. And guess what, thats exactly what has happened since I have been here. I feel like I have met people that I will be great friends with for a long time. People that I honestly feel like I can be myself around, not the Utahnized Arin, but just Arin. And people that like us just as much as we like them, I think anyways. Also, instead of hoping that "that group" will take me in, I have focused on trying to bring people together and have everyone be a part of the group. In return, I have made friends with a broad range of people with lots of different interests. They may not all turn out to be my go-to friends that I call on a moments notice, but they all have great things to offer and I enjoy being around them.

I don't feel the pressure to have a perfectly clean house and perfectly groomed children all the time. The truth is, it doesnt matter how many times I mop my floor, its just going to be sticky and crumby again in a matter of minutes, sometimes even seconds. So why stress out about it? As long as my house isn't disgusting and its comfortable and welcoming, that's enough for me. The truth is no matter how many times I wipe my boys' faces they are still going to have dried snot, chocolate, or their breakfast on it all day. And anyone who knows Stockton knows that no matter how many times a day I comb his hair, it is still going to be stringy and frizzy. The important thing to me is that they are happy and that they feel loved everyday by their parents.

I guess what I am getting at is it takes alot of time and effort to have a picture perfect life. And it seems like in order to have everything be so perfect, something has to be sacrificed. Whether its money, time, or meaningful relationships. I would rather spend the day chasing Stockton around the house, hearing him learn to talk, watching Logan figure out how to crawl and get into everything, waste the day talking to Troy about everything and nothing, building meaningful friendships, going on a walk, or reading one of the many books on my list. I don't want to spend all of my time making my life look perfect when all I am really doing is missing out on everything that actually makes it perfect. So, Amy, to answer your question, moving to Idaho has helped me to do that and that is why I like it so much here.

A Mover and a Shaker

2011-04-11T23:16:00.000-06:00

Logan is officially on the move now and has been for almost 2 weeks now. I am glad b/c it makes it so much easier for him to be entertained. He has been wanting to go for a long time and was getting pretty frustrated, now he putters around and plays without feeling abandoned. Now that he has mastered crawling, he is already moving on to pulling himself up on everything so he can start to walk. This is especially annoying in the bathtub. He doesnt understand that,
A) he hasnt quite mastered the "pull yourself up" technique, and
B) the bathtub isnt the best place to practice.
I pretty much have to have one hand on him at all times in the bathtub to avoid him dunking himself every 30 seconds. I guess I can't say I wasnt warned, this kid has been moving almost non stop from the time I felt his first kicks. The only time I can get him to sit still is when I rock him before naps and bedtime. It is these times that I just want to hold him and never put him down. It is those moments that he makes up for being such a rascal. And just by being so cute.

Brothers

2011-03-17T23:12:00.001-06:00

When I was pregnant with Logan, I was always worried that I wouldn't get to spend as much time with him as I did with Stockton when he was born and that I would be missing out on spending one-on-one time with both of them. My sister would always tell me that it would be OK because I would get to see them as Brothers and there was something really special about that. I am starting to realize now what she meant. Logan has really started to love Stockton lately even though Stockton isn't always the nicest to him. There are 2 particular stories that I wanted to document so I could remember them.

#1: Stockton likes to climb into Logan's crib to play with his mobile, play with his stuffed animals, and turn the lamp on and off b/c he can reach it. Logan is normally a good sport even though he is mostly just getting trampled on the whole time. Now that he is sitting up, I think it is a little less torturous for him. On this particular occasion Stockton was playing and Logan was sitting there just looking at Stockton with the biggest grin on his face. Stockton kept playing and Logan just kept smiling. As soon as Stockton sat down beside him, Logan reached up, grabbed Stockton by the hair, and threw him down on the bed. I was so shocked, but it was hilarious to witness. Luckily Stockton thought it was funny, too. I am sure he wont think so for much longer.

#2: Stockton has a little buddy that we watch for a few hours every week. His name is Rhett. Logan was sitting in the floor playing with some of his trucks when Rhett decided that he wanted to play with them. So he went over and took them from Logan. Stockton (who takes toys from his brother ALL day long) witnessed his brother being picked on, ran over to Rhett, yelled what I can only assume were profanities, snatched the truck from Rhett, and gave it back to his brother. I hope he will always stick up for him like that.

Painting the Bathroom

2011-03-09T21:39:00.000-07:00

So, I have alot of projects that have been on my to-do list for quite sometime, but for some reason I am really just itching to paint my downstairs 1/2 bath. It is just so plain and boring. It is currently tan (just like the rest of our house) with a white pedestal sink, toilet, and a white cabinet. I want to do something that would look good with white.

So the question is, do I try something fun like yellow or lime green??

Or play it safe with a pretty grayish blue or grayish purple????

What is your vote? Any other good suggestions?

Logan @ 6 months

2011-03-08T00:01:00.001-07:00

Logan is our happy baby. And by that I mean he is the sweetest, happiest baby in the world as long as his tummy is full of milk and his Mother is either holding him or giving him her undivided attention. He loves me. He will be perfectly content playing and then I will walk in room, he will see me and then start crying for me. (This is usually accompanied by the "mad face" as referenced in my previous post.) It is precious, but not always convenient for me.

Here are some highlights of his personality right now:

*He is starting to love playing with his brother. Even though Stockton isn't always the nicest older brother in the world, it is so fun to see them beginning to play with each other. Stockton will act silly and Logan will just laugh and laugh. It is nice having a extra person around to help entertain him.
*He loves milk in any form, whether its breast milk or formula, but he does NOT like eating from a spoon. He will do it, but he definitely lets you know that he is not enjoying it throughout the entire process. Fresh pureed mango is about the only thing that he seems to enjoy eating. He must just have very exotic taste.
*He hates getting dressed. This also includes diaper changes. He gets so happy when you take his clothes off and wiggles and squirms as much as he can when you try to put them back on.
*He is temperamental. He goes from 0 to 60 in a split second. He can be happy, just laughing and smiling and if you do something to disrupt this, he will let you know about it. I think he is going to be our yeller, because he sure knows how to yell already. And by yell, I dont mean cry really loud, I literally mean YELL. Its like he is telling you where to go and how to get there. I won't make any speculations about which parent he may have inherited this quality from.
*He likes me to sing to him. Whether it is a soft, quiet song or a fun, upbeat song, he just loves it. I tried singing to Stockton when he was a baby and to this day if I try and sing to him, he just gets annoyed. But Logan loves it and that makes me happy.
*He is really wanting to MOVE! I dont think crawling is too far off for this kid. He is definitely trying to figure out how to get his body to do what his brain is telling it and once he does he is going to be a mess of trouble. He doesnt know how to sit still. The only time he will let me sit down and hold him without squirming is when he is ready to sleep.
*He is finally learning to SLEEP. Apparently all we needed to do this whole time was force him to sleep in his crib instead of with us. He had to cry it out one night, but ever since he has pretty much been sleeping past 6am before waking up to nurse and then going back to sleep until after 8! It has been so nice compared to the last 6 months of waking up every 3-4 hours to feed him.
*He loves his blankie and pacifier just like his brother. I actually tried to get him to choose a stuffed animal as a comfort object instead of a blanket so I dont have to keep track of TWO blankets everywhere we go, but he loves his blanket, there is just no way around it.

*He has a smile that melts my heart everyday. I love how he just opens his mouth as big as he can and lets out the cutest little "coo" I have ever heard. Not only is it his smile, but there is a kindness in his eyes that just radiates.

Stockton talk

2011-03-04T21:31:00.002-07:00

Stockton just keeps talking more and more everyday. It is funny because his speech therapist is on maternity leave so we are just taking a break until she comes back, so of course he starts talking right after she stops coming. I am tempted to call her and tell her how great he is doing, but I don't want to be one of "those" parents. Even though I am quite certain Stockton actually is her favorite. How could he not be? Here are some of the cute things I want to remember that he is saying right now. Anyone with kids of their own knows that it isn't what they are saying as much as it is how they say it.

"Naan"- Hand (he says this when he wants me to walk down the stairs with him)
"Mon"- Come on
"Nin"- Again
"Uh-Baw"- Ball
"Uh-Dee"- Keys
"Uh-Co"- Coat
"Boo"- Blue
"Geen"- Green
"Hi" and "Bye" (he likes to play a game while I am feeding Logan. He will come in the door, waive, and say "Hi!", then he will waive, say "Bye!", and close the door. So cute.)

And he said his first two-word sentence: "Bye Daddy!"

It is so nice to hear him talking so much, but sad to know that he is just growing up more and more everyday.

Logan's mad face

2011-03-02T11:10:00.000-07:00

This is Logan's new face.

I like to call it his mad face because it normally surfaces at times like these:
*when he gets his nose wiped
*when his brother takes his toys from him
*when Mom is holding him and he wants to eat.
*when he can't quite reach something he wants

It is also accompanied by a rapid snorting sound.

Joy to my heart...

More growing up

2011-02-22T21:44:00.001-07:00

I swear just in the last week these 2 boys have grown up so much...

Logan is sitting up all by himself without falling over and has learned to roll all over the floor in an effort to get toys that he wants. I worry about the day this boy becomes mobile. I think we will have our hands full in comparison to Stockton as a baby. He has also started reaching for Mommy, it is so sweet.

Stockton just started talking overnight. He will repeat pretty much anything you ask him to say and now the list of words he says is too long for me to even remember. I have been worried about him being delayed, but now that he is talking so much, I just want him to stop. Its kind of means that he isn't a baby anymore, doesn't it? Some new things/words he has been doing the last few days.

-Buzz
-"Mo" (Remote)
-"Dee-Doo" (Thank You)
-"Doo-Doo" (Choo Choo)
-"Baa" (Pull)
-On
-Doggy
-Hi
-Bye
-"Weema" and "Grandma"
-"Peas" (Please)
-"Nana" (banana)
-Bowl
-I have been trying to encourage him to ask nicely for things (say Please), but instead of saying please he does the sign for Nice. It is pretty cute.

-He has been watching a video called, Letter Factory (thanks Michonne), that teaches him his letters and their sounds. I am amazed at how fast he is picking it up. He loves it and wants to watch it everyday instead of Toy Story. Tonight while he was taking a bath, he picked up the letter "S" and said "Sssss". I was so impressed that I decided to test him on his other letters and was pleasantly surprised with how many he knew. I was happy, but also almost felt like a lousy parent that he learned it from a video and not from me. Oh well, I guess I should just be happy that he is watching those types of videos rather than mindless cartoons, right?

Stockton was nice enough tonight to let Logan play with his little Woody tonight before bed.

You can tell Logan is studying his every move to make sure he knows how to play with it correctly.

Even after his lesson, he is still thinking, "Am I doing this right?"

Is there a cuter baby in the whole wide world?

2011-02-17T21:47:00.000-07:00

I think not.

I was just looking through some recent pictures and these were just too cute not to share. He is my little sweetheart. :)

This really is the good life

2011-02-15T22:36:00.001-07:00

Tonight while doing the dishes, listening to good music, I was actually thinking about all the reasons why my life is so good, rather than my usual internal whine fest. So I thought I would take a minute to jot down some of my thoughts so I could remember them the next time I want to give my kids away, the next time I want everything that I dont need, the next time I am missing my friends and family, and the next time I am thinking that everyone else has it so much better than me.

These are some things that I need to remember everyday that I am so lucky to have:

-Two beautiful, healthy baby boys that make me smile everyday
-A husband that loves me and allows me to be who I am
-Two sisters that I can talk to about anything and they still have no choice but to like me anyways.
-Telephones and the internet that allow me to talk to my family and friends whenever I want.
-A beautiful home that is bigger and nicer than anyone would ever need.
-Enough money to be able to stay home with my children
-My health
-Plenty of food to eat everyday
-Running water and all of the conveniences that us spoiled Americans take for granted everyday
-The opportunity to experience living in a new place and meeting new people
-The knowledge that no matter how down I feel sometimes, things could always be much much worse

Overdue update

2011-02-08T22:06:00.000-07:00

I was just looking through all the pictures on my camera and realized it has been a long time since I have posted an update so I thought I better give it a shot instead of mopping my floors like I should be doing....

Christmas was a lot of fun this year now that Stockton was old enough to really enjoy it alot more. Having kids really does bring the magic back into it. I am going to really start looking forward to Christmas each year now. Here are both of the boys after opening their presents from Santa and Mom & Dad. And a few others from the morning.

The boys are definitely starting to be more like brothers. Logan loves it when Stockton will play with him and Logan justs gives him the biggest, cheesiest smiles. Stockton goes back and forth when it comes to playing nicely and when he can be a little rough or annoying. He has a problem with wanting to decide what Logan should be playing with rather than just allowing him to play with whatever he is enjoying at the moment. Overall, I think they are really starting to love each other. Stockton always wants to sleep in Logans bed with him and whenever I have let them nap together on Mom & Dad's bed, Stockton will always hold Logan's hand until they fall asleep. And just a few days ago, they had their car seats side by side in the car (normally there is a seat between them) and Stockton held Logan's hand the whole time we were driving. It is so sweet.

We celebrated Stockton's 2nd birthday in January. As generic as it sounds, I can't believe it has been 2 years. He is still so small, it is hard to believe he is actually 2. At his check up, his weight was the 3rd percentile, height was the 14th percentile, and his head was the 93rd percentile. Just hearing those measurements makes me wonder how he is even able to walk without toppling over all day long. He is still Mommy's precious angel and spends most of his day following me around the house saying, "Mommy, Mommy, Mommy..." He definitely loves his Mommy, but Daddy is at the top of his list too. He always makes sure to throw in a few "Daddys" through out the day and point at the door. His speech therapy is going pretty well. I think he probably speaks about 10 words now and signs probably around 20. He continues to improve each week, so we are happy about that. Stockton has always been our perfect sleeper from the very beginning. He has always loved sleeping in his own bed and has never had a problem putting himself to sleep, but he had a HORRIBLE nightmare on New Years Eve and his sleeping has been a work in progress ever since. He was terrified to even go near his bed or our bed for about a week afterwards. We have him sleeping in his own bed now, but still freaks out if we put him in our bed at night. And he has a hard time going back to sleep if he wakes up in the middle of the night. Hopefully things will continue to improve and he will be back to his old self eventually. Here are some of his favorite things right now:
Favorite Food: chocolate milk and cheese
Favorite Movies/Shows: Toy Story, Madagascar, Whinnie the Pooh, and Wonder Pets
Favorite Book: I Love My Mama (about the mommy and baby elephants) and his animal flap book
Favorite word: Mommy, Please, and NO!
Favorite Toys: Woody & Buzz, blocks, and his animals
Favorite thing to drive Mom crazy: Climbing on the kitchen counters

Logan: where do I even begin with you? You are the CUTEST baby I have ever seen in my life. I just wish I could take good pictures to justify how beautiful you are. You have the roundest, perfect face, the perfect amount of chubbiness, and a smile that melts my heart. When Stockton was a baby, everywhere I went people would tell me how cute he was, but I NEVER get any comments about Logan. I am baffled by this because, lets be honest, Stockton was precious, but he wasnt the cutest baby in the world, but Logan is absolutely adorable. I was talking to my sister about this and we came to the conclusion that it has to be his stork bite. After she brought it up (her son had one, too) then it made sense. Because that is normally the only comment I get, even from family members, is about when/if his birth mark will fade away. I have even had one of the sample ladies at Costco, not once, but TWICE say something about it to me. She didnt start the conversation by telling me how cute he was, she simply stated, "My granddaughter had a mark like that on her head, but dont worry, it will fade away". My response was, "I am not worried about it". Needless to say, I will be avoiding her on any future Costco visits. It is so weird because I honestly dont even see it when I look at him. It makes me sad that it is obviously the only thing that some people see. Anyways, I didnt mean to go off on a tangent about that. Back to Logan....he is such a happy, playful baby who just wants my attention all the time. I can tell he is going to be our "get into everything" baby because he is so grabby and getting very anxious to go go go, he doesnt know how to sit still! It seems like he always has an agenda. That is so much different than how Stockton was, I am a little nervous about the trouble he will cause once is mobile. He still wants to eat ALL the time!! He drives me crazy though because he wants to eat EVERYTHING in sight, but he HATES being spoon fed. I dont know if it is the baby food he doesnt like or the act of being fed. He loves sucking on crackers and toast and anything that he can do himself. He loves talking, growling, grabbing his feet, and bouncing in his exersaucer thing.

If you are wondering why Logan's orange shirt looks strangely familiar, it is because its the same orange shirt that Stockton was wearing this past summer. That's right he was 18+ months old and Logan is only 5 months.

Bekah's 30 in 30

2011-02-07T21:14:00.002-07:00

One of my very best friends in the whole wide world is doing something really fun, she is going on 30 blind dates in the 30 days before her 30th birthday. Unfortunately, I am a lame friend that can't find her any guys to sign up because either A) all the single guy friends that I have are the same single guys friends that she has, or B) all the guys I know are married.

So, that is where some of you might be able to help. Check out her blog, http://www.beks30in30.blogspot.com/, and refer any guys that you think might be interested to check it out, too. Who knows what could happen, right? :)

P.S. To anyone from Boise that might be reading my blog, I would really, really welcome some candidates from you because if I could get Bekah to fall for a guy up here then that means I could possibly get her to follow him here, just like I did!!!

Goodbye my friend.

2011-01-27T21:28:00.001-07:00

I am actually a little sad to announce that Stockton went to sleep for the first time without his pacifier tonight. I am relieved that it was an easier weaning process than I anticipated, but sad to think this is a sign that he is turning into a big boy instead of my little baby. It was time though. He was starting to drive me crazy about it. He has been pretty good at only having it for bedtime and in the car, but lately he has been asking for it CONSTANTLY. And then when I dont give it to him or I have to take it away from him, he throws a royal temper tantrum. I happened to read somewhere that if you cut a hole in it, then they will eventually lose interest because it isnt soothing to them anymore. I did that on Wednesday and anytime he asked for it, I gave it to him. And it worked! He just didnt really want it anymore. It was great because I didnt have to fight him on it! It's like he realized on his own that he didnt want it! Tonight when I put him to bed, he took it out of him mouth, handed it to me, and went to sleep! That is nothing short of a miracle in my opinion. So it is with sadness and relief that I say my final farewell to the days of the paci. Although, I am sure I will miss my friend during temper tantrums at the grocery store...SIGH.....

My Mom

2011-01-26T22:49:00.003-07:00

My mom just came to visit from Idaho this past week and ever since she left, I havent been able to stop feeling sad. It was just such a great visit, probably one of the best times I have had with my Mother in my adult life. I am lucky to have such a fun Mom. I am not the best writer, but I am really good at making lists. So while my emotions are still fresh from her visit, I want to list everything I love about my Mom so that she knows it and so I can always look back and remember them.

1. She is fun. Because of her, I already force my own children to turn the music up and sing and dance. Even though I am sure I look like a fool, just like my Mom did, I remember how much fun it was even though we always tried to act like it was stupid.

2. She spoils us in a way that she was never able to do when we were kids. I mentioned while we were getting ready for Stockton's birthday party that I wish I had more cute, stylish serving dishes. So when we went to Ross to return something, she bought me almost $100 worth of serving dishes. At Ross, you can get ALOT for $100! Now every time I use them I will think of her.

3. She lets me be myself. She let me go through every single throw pillow at Ross for about an hour and told me that she liked everyone even though I am sure my indecisiveness was annoying. She is always supportive about little things like that. When I told her the plans for Stockton's birthday party, rather than trying to do things the way she thought was best, she just helped me make sure everything was done the way I wanted it. And was just there to help and support.

4. She taught me to believe in fairies and all magical things. That may sound weird, but I am glad that I was encouraged to believe in Unicorns and given the impression that Mother Nature was actually a real person that made everything on the earth grow and be beautiful. I am glad that she bought my son an animal that when his Dad tells him it is a horse with wings, I can tell him matter of factly, it is actually a Pegasus. And then hope that he believes it actually exists somewhere in a land faraway.

5. She loves Troy. I can tell that she genuinely cares about Troy and she treats him the same way she treats her own children. And it seems like she does this with all of her sons and daughter in laws.

6. She is the best Weema. I have never seen any sign that she loves any of her grandkids more than the rest. She treats them ALL like they are her very favorite and I really think all of them are. She spoils them even more than she does the rest of us. And she is so good at playing with them. It was touching to see the way she gets down on Stocktons level to play with him and how much they both seemed to enjoy it. And she also spoils them more than her own kids. She seriously supplied Logan with his entire newborn wardrobe and she is constantly buying them things here and there just because she wants to.

7. She is strong. She has been through alot in her life. She has experienced alot heartache, betrayal, and loneliness. But she has learned how to be happy with herself and not let her past experiences affect the person she is today.

8. She loves me. Our childhood was far from picture perfect. And she didnt do everything the way I wanted when we were kids, but I always knew without a shadow of a doubt that she loved me. And now that I am a parent, that is what I want my own children to know everyday, how much I love them. My Mom did that for me and I hope my kids will feel that same love from their Mother.

Hopefully she will be back soon for another visit. And maybe the smell of lavender will linger in the air until she comes back, then it will feel like she never left.

Before I was a Mom...

2011-01-04T21:25:00.000-07:00

...I told myself that I would never have snot faced kids. Now I wonder if I will ever NOT have snot faced kids!!!!

We've been busy

2010-12-21T21:04:00.000-07:00

We have been busy the last month...we went to Utah for Thanksgiving and for some much needed family time for me. It was a wonderful, relaxing trip full of time with my sisters, family, and a few friends. While we were there, we went ahead and blessed Logan. We did it at my sister's house and it was a neat, intimate experience. Troy did a great job.

.We have had Christmas festivities going on the last couple of weeks. Christmas gets more fun than ever once you have kids to experience it with.

Logan just gets cuter and cuter everyday. Just looking at him melts my heart in a way that I never thought possible. I love seeing more of his happy personality coming out more and more. He has the funniest laugh, in the beginning, I always thought it was a cry, not a laugh. He seems to be liking his older brother a little more. He actually smiles at Stockton when he tries to "play" with him and he can tolerate Stockton's weight on him alot better than he could in the beginning.

Stockton took a couple of good falls that look like they will end up leaving some scars. I guess its a good thing girls like that...

Four Years

2010-12-01T17:08:00.000-07:00

It is hard to believe it has been 4 years since we were here...

What a perfect wedding it was. There isn't a single thing I would have changed.

4 houses, 3 jobs, and 2 kids later, there isnt a thing I would change today either. Except of course being back in Hawaii with ALL 3 of my Boys!

Thank you, Troy, for making me happy everyday.

Logan's 2 month check up

2010-11-22T21:30:00.006-07:00

ince Logan will be 3 months old this week, I thought I better get his 2 month stats posted....He weighed in at almost 14lbs which put him in the 85th percentile. He was also 85th for his head and 50th for his height. He is our little chunky monkey who loves to eat and soak up any attention that he can get as long as it isnt from his "big" brother. I think Stockton's love and affection is really starting to get on his nerves. Otherwise, he is the happiest most easy going baby that loves to smile and laugh. I just wish he would perform more for the camera. Here are a few recent pics...

Happy Halloween

2010-11-03T14:02:00.006-06:00

Luckily for Stockton we had 3 days worth of Halloween festivities: Our church Halloween carnival on Friday night, our church "Trunk or Treat" on Saturday night, and, of course, Trick or Treating on Sunday. It didnt take Stockton long to catch on to the Trick or Treating idea. He wouldnt let anyone just put candy in his bucket, he had to take it and inspect it first. It was almost like he couldnt believe people were just giving him candy for no reason. I had forgotten how much I loved Halloween as a kid, but I think it is even more fun seeing how much your own kids enjoy it. I am finding that to be true for just about everything these days.

Here are some pics of our little Trick and our little Treat from the weekend.

We only went Trick or Treating on 2 streets, but Logan couldnt even last that long before passing out.

At least he woke up for a few pictures.

Brothers

2010-10-27T21:51:00.001-06:00

Could there be a cuter pair of boys in the whole wide world????

Home

2010-10-21T21:18:00.008-06:00

After moving to Idaho I have learned the truth in the generic phrase, "Home is where the heart is." It really is. We just returned from a short visit to Oklahoma to visit my family. It is always refreshing to return to my roots and be reminded of my childhood and to go "home". We recently went back to Utah for a few days to visit my family and that also was accompanied by those tender feelings of going "home". So how is it that both places can be so equally comforting to go home to? I can't help but wonder in the midst of my loneliness here in Idaho if this place will ever welcome me with the same familiarity and warmth as my childhood home and the home that I figured out who I was and who I wanted to become. I like to believe that it will because this is where I will build my family and my heart will always be with them and the memories we create. Just like it will always be at Ganny's house and Jerry's farm. And just like it will always be on 1223 and just off of Orchard Drive. Because those are the places that are filled with the people I love the most.

Finally making time for an update

2010-10-05T22:56:00.009-06:00

Things are sure busy around here. Although, everyday I feel more and more like I am getting a handle on things. I am starting to believe that maybe I will be able to survive having 2 kids afterall. Three is still debatable at this point.

Logan is 6 weeks old now. Here is a picture of him on his 1 month birthday. Is it just me or does this look like a baby that is older than a month??? He is just getting chubbier and chubbier everyday.
We recently spent a weekend in Utah to celebrate a special occasion with my best friend. Here is Logan at 1 month with his 6 month old cousin, Maggie. Now do you believe that he is big?
He still likes to sleep alot during the day.
But he also tries to help out around the house as much as he can. He gives me more of a workout carrying the laundry up and down the stairs. I sure miss having my laundry room upstairs with all of our bedrooms.
He is getting so much more alert and interactive.
And just started smiling at us the last few days.
Bathtime is so much easier now that I can do it at the same time. Stockton is really good at being careful in the tub. He has only had to pour a cup of water on his face once to realize that wasnt much fun for Logan.
We also love going on walks now that we finally got our new double stroller. Stockton and Logan would both spend all day sitting in it if they could.
Stockton has grown up right before my eyes.
He got a new pair of shoes that he loves to show off everytime he puts them on.
He loves to keep me from getting anything done. This is him "helping" put their clean clothes away.

We got him sleeping in his big boy bed so we could start putting Logan in the crib. This kid has been a champion sleeper his entire life. After napping in his bed twice, he refused to sleep in his crib at all. And it only took 3 days of him getting in and out of bed for him to get the idea. I hope he continues to be so easy with everything forever.

He is learning how to show off and act like a goofball.

He still has his adorable buck-toothed smile.

He may not be getting much bigger, but he is sure growing up more and more everyday.

2 weeks

2010-09-09T13:36:00.004-06:00

Yesterday Logan was 2 weeks old. It seems like it has been so much longer than that already. I dont know if it is because Logan is so big or because things have been so chaotic around here. I feel so frazzled like I have no rhyme or reason to each day. I am hoping to start getting a better handle on things so I feel a little more in control. Luckily, I have had visits from my family that have really helped me to feel more like myself. I remember telling a few people before Logan was born that I just couldnt believe having 2 kids would be that much different than having one, well, I am definitely eating my words now. I had forgotten how much work newborns are!!!!

I was worried that since Stockton has always been such a good baby, that the second one was going to come out a terror child. Logan has proved me wrong so far. He is such a good, easy-going baby. He never cries unless he is hungry (he LOVES to eat!!) and when he is awake is so content just looking around the room. He already seems so much older than 2 weeks, he just seems so aware of everything around him. He will follow my voice with his eyes and head until he finds me and then will just stare at me. He is so much bigger than Stockton was at this point. He has already out grown alot of his newborn clothes and weights almost as much as Stockton did at 2 months. He isnt really fat, just...i dont know....solid. He does have an adorable double chin and chubby little cheeks though. It is hard to believe such a big baby was living inside of me. I guess that explains the stretch marks that I didnt get with little Stockton. :) I just love this picture because it is such a relief to see such a perfectly shaped head. Everyday I am so grateful so a perfectly rounded head instead of a mishaped one like Stockton's. He loves his bathtime. He just relaxes everytime we put him in the water.

Big yawns!!!

Just hangin out.... ...until his big brother spots him on the floor.... ...anytime he can, Stockton loves to lay down, tummy to tummy, and "talk" to him and give him kisses. It is so sweet, but a little scary that he is going to squish him. Logan doesnt seem to mind too much. Stockton hasnt seemed to mind being negleted too much. I do feel bad that I dont get to spend as much one on one time with him as I used to. I miss him. :( I dont think he misses me as much as I miss him though. He has really seized this oppurtunity to become Dad's shadow. Even though it breaks my heart a little that he doesnt need his Mother every minute, it melts my heart to see the bond between Father and Son grow. He is lucky to have a Dad who loves him so much and doesnt mind him tagging along everytime he goes outside or in the garage. And what little boy wouldnt love having a Dad that gets in the swimming pool with all of their clothes on, just because you want them to? This is just one of the reasons why we are all so lucky to have Troy around...

Since we've been home

2010-09-01T13:39:00.006-06:00

Since we've been home...

*I dont feel as skinny as I did when we left the hospital

*I feel like our house constantly smells like a dirty diaper

*I havent cooked a decent dinner for my family

*The house is a never ending pit of housework

*I havent been able to spend any quality time with Stockton and I worry that he has replaced me with Daddy

*I feel like all I do is nurse a baby

*I feel lucky to shower every day. That does NOT include doing my hair or makeup

*I havent gotten more than 4 hours of sleep at night (on a GOOD night)

*I feel like I am busy all day yet nothing seems to have gotten done by the end of the day

Luckily I have a loving and supportive husband that wants to be just as involved as I am in taking care of these 2 beautiful boys. I am so lucky to get to spend all day with them. There is nothing more I could ask for!

The Birth Story

2010-09-01T09:37:00.008-06:00

Most of you know how badly I didnt want to be induced after the long labor I had with Stockton. I finally broke down and scheduled an induction for almost a week after Logan's due date. I had reached my limit and was so far progressed that I figured my labor would still go quickly. I was a little sad that I wouldnt get to experience that surprise of going into labor and allowing the baby to decide when he wanted to come. I had been having contractions for a couple of weeks and even had a few times that I thought, "this could be it, I better call Troy", but, of course, just when I had thrown in the towel and given up hope, Logan decided to prove me wrong. It couldnt have been better timing. Troy had just gotten all of his hours in early in the week because of overtime and we were both able to get a full nights sleep in. I woke up around 6:15 am and had a few pretty good contractions so I thought I would a shower in just in case. Once I was up and moving around, things definately got worse. And then the real kicker right after I stepped out of the shower, my water broke. We both continued to do a quick freshen up and get Stockton dressed and out the door.

Here we are leaving for the hospital. I am still feeling pretty good at this point.

By the time we got to the hospital, it had been over 2 hours since my water broke and the contractions were getting quite annoying to say the least.

I wondered why I wanted to experience this instead of just being induced, getting my epidural, and not feeling any pain.

It took them about an hour after being there to get me my epidural and I felt MUCH better.

My labor lasted between 8-9 hours and after only 30 minutes of pushing.... ...we were kissing these chubby little cheeks!

I can't believe this gigantic baby was living inside of me! I guess that explains the huge round tummy that I had.

Stockton loves playing with his teeny tiny toes.

Stockton has loved his baby brother from the very beginning and he is so gentle with him.

Logan's first bath. He didnt really enjoy it.

Kisses from Big Brother.

And kisses from Little Brother.

Luckily they had a playground right outside of our room that Stockton could play on. He spent quite a bit of time at the hospital and was just perfect the entire time.

Fat baby!

His going home outfit said, "Handsome Like Daddy". We decided after seeing how much he looks like Troy, that would be the only appropriate shirt for him to wear.

Finally going home!!

He has finally arrived!

2010-08-28T21:29:00.005-06:00

Logan Troy Jeffs decided to join us Wednesday August 25, 2010 at 4:43 pm.

He weighed a whopping 8 lbs 10 oz and was 20 1/2 inches long.

We definitely have a proud Dad, Mom, and Big Brother.

More details and pictures to come soon...It turns out things are a little more hectic when you add a new baby to the mix.

No baby yet, but...

2010-08-23T14:42:00.003-06:00

...I got a new car! We have been shopping around for awhile now for a car that would hold all of us a little better and that would last us for awhile once our family is full grown. We definitely found that today! It is a 2005 Ford Explorer XLT with a third row. It is the Eddier Bauer edition so it is FULLY LOADED with everything you can think of: power everything, leather interior, DVD player, GPS navigation system, heated seats, sunroof, and all those other those other little things that are cool, but not cool enough to remember off the top of my head. Plus it has brand new tires and brakes. Of course, we like to think we got a steal of a deal, but who knows, they could have been saying "Suckers" as we were driving away. Either way, who cares, we love it! Now let's just hope a ride home from the hospital in a brand new car with an air conditioner that actually works is just what this baby has been waiting for!

Water Boy

2010-07-29T20:07:00.007-06:00

We have been spending most days at home trying to get things done around the house. I feel bad keeping Stockton cooped up everyday so we have tried going on walks and just playing in the yard, but it is just too hot and I have a hard time keeping up with him on walks. After bringing the dogs home, we decided to give them all baths for the first time in who knows who long? That is when we discovered the secret to keeping Stockton occupied for a long time...the water hose. Next time we give the dogs a bath, we are just going to bring out his baby wash and scrub him down, too. A couple days later, Troy invested in a $3 sprinkler head that is just perfect to set on the patio and barely turn the hose on to let it spray a couple feet in the air. That has kept us occupied for a few days. But today, Grandma brought over, not just a swimming pool, but a TOY STORY (he is obsessed) swimming pool. I think it is safe to say it was an upgrade from the water hose and sprinkler head. And the best part is, I get to park my big belly in a chair, stick my feet in the water, and stay COOL!!

Does this face look familiar?

2010-07-29T19:57:00.003-06:00

This is me (Arin) at 20 months. Stockton just turned 18 months. Does anyone else see the resemblance? I think we definitely know where he got his stringy blonde hair.

Disclaimer: Of course, I do still see alot of Troy in him. Mostly in his expressions and charming personality. I think my genes just dominated his basic physical characteristics. :)

Stockton's New Best Friend

2010-07-25T21:42:00.006-06:00

We transferred the dogs from Troy's brother's house to our house today. I dont know who is happier about it, Uncle Scott or Stockton. Scott is happy to be rid of 3 extra dogs and Stockton is happy that he will get to play with Sariah everyday. He just loves her to death and I think the feeling might be mutual. I am guessing they are bonded by their identical hair color.

This is what happens...

2010-07-23T21:35:00.001-06:00

...when you have an 18 month old trying to entertain himself in the kitchen while you cook.

Pictures of our new house

2010-07-21T23:28:00.007-06:00

Hi everyone, I survived an entire week waiting to have the internet set up at our house, can you believe that?!?! It was actually kind of refreshing and I am certain that I got ALOT more done around the house than I would have if I would have had the computer as a distraction. I am willing to bet that my productivity level will decrease dramatically now that I have the internet to suck all of my time from me.

After 4 months of living in limbo with extended family, we are LOVING having a house to ourselves again and all of our stuff out of storage. That being said, I do want my sister and mother in law to know how much we REALLY APPRECIATE you guys opening your homes to us. I am sure it wasnt always easy having us around. We really enjoyed all of the quality time we were able to spend with everyone and looking back now I wish we could have spent more time doing things together.

Alot of you have been asking me to post pictures of the house so here they are...Obviously some were taken before we moved the furniture in

The Outside

The Entry way

The "formal" living room (or as I like to call it, The "Wasted Space"
You walk from the "living room" into the Great Room. The double doors off the great room are an "Extra room". It is going to be Troy's room to do with whatever he wants.

Troy's room

The opposite side of the great room is the kitchen and dining area

The great room also has a built in desk area that I LOVE

The guest bedroom is located to the right of the front door entry way. It isnt much to look at yet, but it is ready for visitors!! Jenni, I even have your bottled water and magazines as you requested! :)

There is Guest bathroom that attaches the Guest bedroom to the Great room

The first bedroom you run into upstairs is Stockton's room. We have his furniture in, but havent hung anything up yet.

Stockton's room, part 2

The Guest/Kids bathroom

Next is the Master "suite". It really is huge.

Bedroom, part 2
Master bathroom

Master bathroom, part 2

Master closet, part 1

Master closet, part 2 (Do I even need to mention how much I love the closet????)

Finally, we come to the bonus room that has the 4th bedroom attached to it. The Bonus room is going to be the play room and the bedroom is going to be my "hobby" room.

Bonus room, part 2

My "hobby" room (I guess that means I need to find some hobbies. Suggestions, anyone? I think I need to start putting my sewing machine to good use)

"Hobby" room, part 2

I could go on and on about everything I love about the house, and my list of things that I want to do in the house is endless, but all I will say is how lucky we are to be able to afford such a beautiful home. It is more house than me and Troy ever dreamed we would have. I can't believe the drastic difference in the housing market between Idaho and Utah. The cost of living in Idaho definately makes it possible for me to stay at home and spend time with my babies while Troy enjoys going to work at a job he loves. We really couldnt be luckier. Well, I guess I will be able to say that once my family follows us here!

Oregon

2010-07-07T23:08:00.012-06:00

Well, I would definitely rate our weekend in Oregon a first class success. It was a weekend of relaxing and spending time with family that allowed me to do something other than stress about when we will get to move into our house. The weather wasn't too cooperative, but we did have one sunny day on the beach. Stockton loved every minute of it. He is definitely hot blooded like his father and can enjoy getting into any water no matter what the temperature is. I finally had to draw the line and get him out of the water when he was shivering with his lips turning blue. He had no idea that he freezing.

The highlights of the trip:
-Eating at a delicious seafood restaraunt that served fresh, local fish (that's right, I actually used the words "delicious" and "seafood" in the same sentence)
-The cheese sample line at the Tillamook cheese factory
-Our "patriotic" 4th of July breakfast
-Our gourmet 4th of July hamburgers that Pete made us
-And, of course, being able to ride in the van together!!

The highlights of the trip were NOT:
-The "salty" attitudes of almost every Oregonian that we interacted with
-The Oregon Coast aquarium
-Losing Stockton's best pair of jeans at the beach

The scenery was beautiful and the company couldnt have been better. Unless, of course, the Harveys would have been there.

We were really TRYING to enjoy the aquarium. Can you tell?

Stockton did enjoy the fish/shark tunnels.

I dont think either one of them was too excited about taking this picture.

Adorable.

Seeing how much Stockton LOVED kissing and loving his baby cousin, Maggie, sure made me even more excited for him to be a BIG brother!

He was lucky enough to get his very own ice cream cone at the Tillamook cheese factory. He devoured every last bite. And he looked very cute in the process.

Our little beach bum.

I tried VERY hard to get all the boys to look at me and smile. Will was the only one who obliged. Is it just me or is the first time he has ever looked like Pete???

He thought laying with Dad in the sand was the coolest thing in the world.
One of the few bursts of sunlight and blue skies.

Troy wanted to capture the essence of the back of the van. It was a tight fit, but we did it!

Thanks to the Vanderlindens for letting us crash your party! It was a much needed getaway for us!

So Close!!!

2010-06-30T09:10:00.002-06:00

We found out yesterday that we should be able to close on our house the end of next week or the beginning of the following week! I CAN'T WAIT!!! I am getting so anxious to start "nesting" for this baby, sleeping in my own bed, NOT sharing a room with an 18 month old, and MANY MANY MANY other joys that having your OWN space brings! Troy has Friday and Monday off so we decided to go spend a few days on the Oregon coast with my sister and her family. That should make the time waiting to close pass quickly and, even better, the temp there is only in the 60s so I get a break from sweating to death in this summer heat. I better go start packing since we are leaving TOMORROW!! YIPEE!!!

Camping Weekend

2010-06-28T19:46:00.007-06:00

We spent this past weekend camping with Troy's family. His brother took us to a beautiful place a few hours away. It was quite the drive, but definately worth the trip especially since this will probably be the only chance we get to go camping this year. Between moving into our house and having Baby Boy, I dont know if we will get to go again. I know I have said it a hundred times, but Stockton is definately going to be a mountain man. He is 100% boy and it is showing more and more. His favorite thing right now is definately riding four wheelers. If it seems like all of our pictures are of him on the four wheeler, that is because that is where he was ALL weekend! If we werent on a ride, he was sitting on it pretending he was driving. We went on a 40 mile ride and when we got back, he still cried because he wanted to keep going. I loved watching him and Dad riding together, it just melts my heart seeing them do things together. He is lucky to have a Daddy that loves him so much. They were best friends all weekend. My weekend was full of "stay away from me" looks and crying anytime I would try and hold him. I sure felt like I had been replaced. I guess I can deal with that from time to time since I know how much he really needs me.

This is the treatment I got most of the weekend.

Here is Stockton and Troy's "Forrest Gump" picture.

Here is an example of the "Mom, you better stay away from look" that he mastered over the weekend.

I finally got a picture of him giving his goofy toothy grin, but of course it is blurry. You can see his little chicklets a little bit. :)

A little sad

2010-06-21T07:45:00.003-06:00

I had my first real dose of "home sickness" this weekend. My sister and her family stopped in Boise for a couple of days on their way to Oregon. Stockton LOVED having 2 of his cousins to play with. He was so happy both days he woke up and they were still here. We took them to the Cherry Festival and he rode his very first carnival ride with Sam and Will. He had a blast. He loved it so much that his Uncle Pete went and bought him more tickets so he could ride again, but he refused to ride it without his cousins, I guess that is what made it so much fun for him. It was so cute. I wish I had the pictures to post, but they are on my sister's camera. The rest of the weekend was spent just following them around and rough housing with each other. It is funny how if he falls down on his own he comes crying to Mommy, but when he is thrown to the ground wrestling with his cousins, then it is the funniest thing in the world. I guess boys are just weird like that...

On Saturday after they left, we went to a neighborhood park that has water fountains for the kids to play in. We have gone a couple of times, but normally we are the only ones there. Going on a hot Saturday afternoon, that wasnt the case. There were alot of families there and tons of little kids running through the water. I got really sad seeing Stockton just stand there looking lost watching the other kids run around having fun. I couldnt help but think that if he had any of his cousins there with him, that he would have been so happy chasing them around. I am very close to my sisters and I knew that I would be sad about him not seeing his cousins on an almost daily basis, but this was the first time I have dealt with it first hand. I hope there is still a way they will all be able to be best friends with each other and that we will see them enough that he wont forget them.

It was a sad realization to know that I am really his only friend everyday and lets face it, I am not that fun. On the bright side, he will have a little brother soon so lets cross our fingers that they will love each other as much as I am planning on. :)

Having fun in Boise

2010-06-15T07:28:00.009-06:00

I have enjoyed living in Boise so far even though it doesnt really feel like I actually live here yet. Hopefully once we move into our house it will start to feel more like home and less like a never ending vacation.

Stockton seems to be enjoying the wide open spaces. He has become obsessed with his Uncle Scott's "tractor" and loves helping Daddy mow the lawn while we are out there.
Daddy is also trying to get him into football, much to his mother's disapproval. I think he has too many other better sports to focus on rather than football, like basketball, soccer, ice hockey, tennis...anything other than football. I must say though, he sure was cute to watch. I guess if he stays this cute instead of turning into a bone headed jock, then he can keep playing.

This weekend was full of adventure. We went biking along the Boise river on Saturday and then four wheeling all day Sunday. And then Troy decided he needed another day off work so he decided to have the stomach flu all night Sunday and Monday. You would think after having 4 months off work that he could work a full week, but I guess it's just something he needs to gradually ease back in to. Just kidding, I am glad he is feeling better and hope Stockton and I are lucky enough not to get it. He was miserable.

As you can see, this kid LOVES playing in the water. It was FREEZING cold, but you couldnt get him out of it. He must get that from his father. Troy will swim in any water. Once his clothes were soaking wet and his feet were bright red, we pulled him out kicking and screaming.

It was a long drive to go four wheeling and Stockton was getting very grumpy in his car seat so I decided once we got on to the dirt roads in the mountains, that I would let him out and just sit on my lap. I grew up riding around on dirt roads, so what would it matter, right? Well, apparently that wasnt enough for him. He wanted to help Daddy drive. Of course, it didnt take long for Daddy to give in and let him sit on his lap. He loved it.

Tell me this kid doesnt just belong in the outdoors...

He was definately pooped out by the end of the day.

This coming weekend we are going to the Emmett Cherry Festival with my sister and her family when they come through on their way to Oregon. I can't wait to see them and hopefully convince them that they want to live in Idaho, too!!

Home Sweet Home

2010-06-07T12:59:00.003-06:00

I am VERY excited to say that we were able to find a house within only a week of living in Boise! We were lucky to find a screaming deal in the crashed housing market here. We will be living in the rural community of Star, ID. We should be able to close in about 30 days so we will have a few weeks to get settled before Baby Boy arrives in August. Now all of you can start visiting soon!!!!

Farewell, Old Friend

2010-06-02T12:38:00.003-06:00

This post is mostly for me to just feel some closure. It has been one week since I quit my job with Marriott. This whole process of moving and the waiting that has accompanied it, has been long, stressful, and a little chaotic. I knew that I was sad to quit the job that I have spent 9 years of my life with, but it wasn't until I walked out of the building for the last time that I really felt it. I don't remember the last time I have cried like that because I was just sad. I sat in the parking lot trying to compose myself and figure out why I was reacting so emotionally. And this is what I figured out...That is essentially the only "real" job I have ever had and the job that supported me 9 of the 10 years I spent in Utah. Those 10 years were a time of constant change, growth, and learning who I was and what I wanted to become. It was a time of being young and free right after high school, traveling to all sorts of places that I normally wouldn't have been able to, getting married and later divorced, learning to be independent and support myself financially, finding my course to spirituality, dating again and finding the love of my life, getting married and starting a family. During these 10 years, I moved 10 times. During all of these changes, my job with Marriott was the only thing that remained constant, never changing. It was like my home base. It has been sad to close that chapter in my life, but I will love re-reading that chapter over and over again and remembering all the memories that my job was a part of. I am excited to start writing a new chapter and am so happy that Troy and our family are my home base now. Marriott will never compare to that.

Pete's Post

2010-05-25T05:57:00.003-06:00

For those of you who dont know, my sister's husband, Pete, played a very nasty joke on all of us a few months back and almost died. Luckily, not only is he still with us, but he has made an almost full recovery. We have all seen the changes in him after his experience, the deeper love for his wife and kids and all the people around him. It has been refreshing to see this softer side of him again, even if it has taken some getting used to. Sorry Pete, you had gotten a little rough around the edges over the years. :) Anyways, he recently made a post on his blog called, The Spiritual Me. I thought it was a great post and wanted to share it with anyone that may be interested. I don't know that I want to go into a big long post about my thoughts on the balance of religion and spirituality, but I really enjoyed this insight into his thoughts as they are things that I reflect on regularly. It is nice to know that I'm not the only one. Maybe one of these days, I will have the time to blog a little more about my own thoughts on the issue.

Our New Adventure

2010-05-18T13:46:00.007-06:00

I am excited to OFFICIALLY be able to say that Troy will be taking a job and moving our family back to ....

An opportunity at his previous employer presented itself to us and we decided to take the leap. We are both very excited and very sad at the same time. I have been really anxious to move up there over the last few months, but now that it is official, the reality of it is sinking in. Obviously, I am so sad to leave my family and friends , but I am surprisingly really having a hard time leaving my job where I have spent the last 9 years. I know I will love being a stay at home mom, but I have always worked and I don't know how it will feel to just rely on Troy for everything and not make any financial contribution to our family. The idea seems so weird to me. I dont want to dwell on all of the obvious negative things about leaving Utah. Some of the things I am most excited about:

*Getting to spend more time with Troy's family so they can be close to our kids and vice versa (I am counting on still seeing my family alot since I know they will come to Boise often, RIGHT????)
*Being one step closer to getting my dream house in the country
*Living in a more rural/down to earth place

*Getting into a more affordable home so we can have more resources to play and do the things we enjoy
*Troy having a job that he ENJOYS so he is happier and can be home with us more
*Camping and playing!
*The chance to get to know and explore a new city and state
*Not having to work so I can focus on being a wife, mother, and having the chance to explore new hobbies that I have wanted to learn about for so long.

Utah, you have had a good 10 year run, but I am excited to take on a new adventure...Idaho, you better not let me down!

The Zoo

2010-05-18T04:47:00.007-06:00

Two posts in two days, shocking right? Well, since Troy is out of town I figured I would post these cute pics of Stockton that I got at the zoo yesterday so he could see them. We have been to the zoo a few times this year, but I think this was the first time Stockton REALLY enjoyed seeing the animals. The last few weeks his love of animals has really taken off. His favorite books to read all involve lots of pictures of animals. He used to LOVE horses, but it seems cows are starting to pull ahead now. He has even started to MOO when he sees pictures and kissing the picture of one cow in particular. Yesterday, the giraffes were definitely his favorite to see. Here are the pics from the day:

Hangin out with one of his cute little girlfriends.

Such a handsome boy. Uncle Scott, how do you like his shirt???
I can't believe how white his hair is getting. I never imagined I would have a toe-headed baby.
He was running around with his hands in the air, just laughing and laughing.

Is it just me or does he not look exactly like Troy in this picture just with blonde hair and blue eyes?? From the look on his face, to the way he is walking, and even his style. All he needs is just a Boise St hat to wear backwards and you wouldnt be able to tell the two of them apart. :)

He loved touching the water,
but then decided splashing was much more fun.

He wasn't too excited when mom decided he was wet enough.

After we got home, he enjoyed a good game of peek a boo with me and his Auntie.

Stockton's new favorite thing

2010-05-16T08:07:00.005-06:00

Stockton has always had a fascination with the vacuum. Anytime I vacuum it is a bigger job than it needs to be because he likes to follow me around and try to touch the light on the front of the vacuum. Well, we were recently at a store that had toy area for kids and he found a toy vacuum to entertain him the entire time we were there. He just followed me around pushing this little vacuum back and forth like he was a pro. When it was time to leave, he threw the biggest fit I have seen my precious boy throw. So, like any loving mother who can't help but want to give her child everything they want, I dropped Stockton off at home with Dad and went to find him one of these vacuums. He has been addicted ever since. At least now he is willing to share with his cousins. The first few days he would scream if either of them even touched it. Hopefully living with my sister during this time will teach him a lesson or two about sharing.

Quilts from Ganny

2010-04-23T06:29:00.004-06:00

My Grandma has been making quilts for all of her great-grand kids and I was excited to get 2 in the mail yesterday for Stockton and Baby Boy. Stockton's has tractors and Baby Boy's is a cowboy theme. She even equipped us with matching crib sheets and pillow cases! :) I never thought a 15 month old boy could be so excited about a blanket, but he DEFINITLEY was! Here are some pics of his reactions...

Here is his smile right after taking it out the box.

He just ran right over and laid down on it!

He couldnt stop smiling, touching, and pointing at all the tractors.

He even loved his baby brother's cowboy quilt. I hope he doesnt get too attached to it in the next few months.

After the initial excitement wore off he still just laid on the blankets and watched TV. Him and Mack even had fun playing in the empty box.

Thank you Ganny for helping to get him in touch with his Oklahoma heritage!!

Happy Easter

2010-04-23T05:37:00.006-06:00

Yes, I know I posted alot of Easter pics, but last year I didnt get one picture of him in his Easter outfit before he pooped all over his white pants so I thought I had to make up for it this year. We had a really fun Easter at my sister's house this year. Here is the run down...

Stockton's candy addiction started on Easter this year. I am not a big Easter basket person, I told myself that I wouldnt do them for my kids. We never had candy or Easter baskets, but had a blast just coloring and hunting the good ol fashioned hard boiled eggs, so why would my kids need more than that? But on Easter morning Stockton was very interested in his cousins' baskets so I just threw the Easter bunny his Grandma Bonnie got him with a few plastic eggs filled with candy into his basket and thought we would just see what he would do. He somehow automatically knew that their was candy in the eggs and went straight for them. Things got worse when his Weema arrived with his very own Easter basket packed full of chocolate, candy, and even his very own Zhu zhu pet. It has been a downward spiral of sugar addiction ever since...

We just knew after a morning of scouring for plastice, candy filled eggs that he would just be all over hunting eggs in the yard. He seemed very excited at first, but then decided it was much more fun to chase his cousins around the yard and just play...

Another Boy!

2010-04-12T04:59:00.002-06:00

I have been a very unmotivated blogger lately, dont ask me why, probably just lazy. I did want to document that we are very excited to be having another BOY!! I love the idea of having 2 little playmates so close in age. Everyday I get more and more anxious to know what he will be like, if he will look just like Stockton or totally different. If he is going to be an easy baby like Stockton has been or a wild and crazy one.

At first, I didnt think being pregnant was nearly as exciting the 2nd time around because I'm not reading about the development every single week and soaking up every bit of information about pregnancy that I possibly could. I already kind of knew what to expect when it came to pregnancy. Although, now that we are getting closer and we have the identity of another little boy, I am starting to think it is MORE exciting this time around. I know everything that we have to look forward to rather than just being blindly being excited about the uncertainty of having a baby. I can't wait to cuddle a precious little newborn again and be melted by every new facial expression. I can't wait to watch two children grow and progress and learn to be siblings and love each other. I have been worried about being able to love another child as much as I love Stockton, but I am already starting to see how your love multiplies rather than divides. This new chapter in our lives can't come fast enough!!

Stockton-The First Year

2010-03-08T05:22:00.005-07:00

January 21, 2009

February 21, 2009
March 21, 2009

April 21, 2009

May 21, 2009

June 21, 2009

July 21, 2009

August 21, 2009

September 21, 2009

October 21, 2009

November 21, 2009

December 21, 2009

January 21, 2010

Thank you baby boy for the best year of my life. You truly are my little miracle.

BiRtHdAy BoY part 2

2010-02-10T05:36:00.008-07:00

We had Stockton's birthday party the Saturday after his actual birthday so that Troy's family could come down and celebrate with us. I think it turned out really fun for everyone. We grilled hamburgers, had a pinata for the kids, opened presents, and of course had cake.

We got one of the string pinatas so that Stockton could at least try and participate and so we didnt have small children swinging a bat in the middle of our living room. He got to go first, but after that the other kids pretty much took over. I think he enjoys being a part of the "cousin chaos" even if it is just watching from the sidelines.

He scoured through everyone's candy to pick and choose what he wanted. As you can see, he went straight for whistles. He loves blowing whistles and Daddy's duck calls.

I think he ended up with a good amount of candy of his own.

Next, we moved on to presents. I didnt get many good pictures of him opening them because he was swarmed by all of his cousins "helping" him. :) He didnt show too much interest in anything, probably because he just enjoys sitting back and watching the "cousin chaos". But once they brought out his 4-wheeler from his cousins Chaunie and Marissa (and their boyfriends) he absolutely LOVED it!

We had to take it away from him to take it out of the box and he did not like that at all. We didnt get a picture of him actually crying, but his patience was very, very thin waiting to get it back.

My very kind and talented friend, Cami, made him this birthday banner. It turned out so cute! It will be a fun banner to use for his birthday each year. Thanks Cami!

Another friend made his birthday cake for him and it turned out AWESOME! It was excactly what I had in mind! Thanks Jordan, you have a great talent!

Stockton thought the cake looked pretty fun, too. He couldnt wait to get his hands on it!

It was so cute when we all started singing Happy Birthday. As you can tell from the next 2 pictures, Stockton got the most embarrassed smile on his face. It was so funny. Right at the end, the embarrassed smile turned into total fear. I think if the song would have been any longer he would have burst into tears. He must have gotten his mother's shy gene.
I think he felt a little weird about everything standing around staring at him eat his cake.But that didnt stop him from diving right in.

It didnt take long for it to turn into a community cousin cake. Luckily no one was sick or I think they would have spread it to everyone. :)

Dad decided that he needed a little help

Doesnt it look like he thoroughly enjoyed it??

I thought it was a perfect party for a perfect little boy!

I had to post these 2 pictures because I thought it was funny how Stockton has the exact same look on his face as Me and Troy. He is our little Mini Me.

BiRtHdAy BoY!

2010-01-30T07:04:00.004-07:00

We celebrated Stockton's 1st birtday a couple weeks ago...I know I can't believe it either.

On his actual birthday he started out the morning getting into bed with Mom & Dad where he was greeted by his new puppy that he absolutely loves.

I made him scrambled eggs for breakfast, but that didnt seem to make him think the day was any different than any other day.

Later on in the day he got to open his presents from Mom & Dad.

Which, of course, was followed by a birthday cupcake. He got a little embarrassed when we sang Happy Birthday to him, but the smile on his face priceless.

More birthday blogging to come. To be continued....

From 3 to 4

2010-01-29T10:35:00.002-07:00

That's right, you guessed it. We were surprised to find out a few weeks ago that our family will be growing from 3 to 4. We are expecting a little brother or sister for Stockton around the middle of August. We are really excited to be almost finished with the first trimester and moving into the "safe zone" of the pregnancy so I dont have to worry anymore. :) We can't wait to see how our lives will change again soon!

Spaghetti for dinner has never been so much fun

2010-01-13T06:01:00.004-07:00

I hope these moments never get old...

Stockton's first Christmas

2010-01-13T05:40:00.004-07:00

Stockton was big enough to enjoy Christmas this year more than I thought he would. I think mostly because everything was a mess that he could play in. It was fun watching him putter around and get into everything.

His gift from "Santa" was this Whinnie the Pooh tractor. Even though his little legs arent log enough to push yet, he still loves sitting on it and honking the horn.

I think we got the most excited reaction from him when he opened up his little tractor. He would just hold it up in the air and give the biggest grin.

He really liked his jack in the box. He knows how to turn the crank VERY SLOWLY, but he has discoverd it is alot easier if he just pushes the latch with his finger. What a smart kid.

His first tooth brush. I guess that means I have to start brushing his teeth now???

I left Troy in charge of taking a picture of him with all of his Christmas presents and these are the 2 pictures I got. Nice try sweetie, I think I will be in charge of this next year. :)

I am excited to have kids during Christmas now. It definately brings the excitement and magic back into it!

I found my camera!!

2009-12-23T05:44:00.009-07:00

It was hiding in Stockton's closet. I won't speculate how it got there, but I am guessing it might have been the same person that keeps unrolling the toilet paper and pulling all the DVDs off the shelves. Your guess is as good as mine.

I need to catch up on things, so prepare yourself for a really long post...

Stockton went on his first trip to the zoo. My friend had free passes so Stockton got to go with his little girlfriend, Liv. It was a beautiful day. I didnt realize it when we went, but Stockton was sick so he didnt enjoy himself as much as I think he normally would have. We will have to go again when it warms up a little. We had a very low key Thanksgiving this year. It was an "in-law" year so both of my sisters were spending the holiday with their husbands' families, but Troy had to work so we couldnt go to Idaho. So it was just the 3 of us with Troy's dad. It was a very relaxing day, but it didnt really feel like Thanksgiving without all of the normal chaos. I guess we will have to make up for it on Christmas.

We had the biggest scare of our life the Sunday after Thanksgiving. My sister's husband, Pete, went into severe cardiac arrest in the middle of the night. My sister had to do CPR until the ambulance arrived. He was on life support for 3 days and they gave him a 2-5% chance of survival. That was the longest 3 days of my life trying to cope with how my sister, who is 5 months pregnant with their 3rd child, would survive without Pete. It is truely a miracle that he is still with us today and expected to make an almost full recovery. All of his doctors at IMC have said there is no medical explanation why he rocovered like he did. Whatever the reason, we are so glad you are still around, Peter. Please dont scare us like that again!! If you would like to read their full story you can check out their blog at www.vanderlindenclan.blogspot.com.

Troy and I celebrated our 3 year anniversary. We were planning on spending a night at the Alaskan Inn, but due to Pete's accident, that was put on hold. He had just woken up and was still suffering from severe short term memory loss. My sister needed some sleep so I spent the day with him. Yes, Pete, that's how much I love you, I spent my anniversary explaining to you over and over again where Jenni was and why you were in the hospital. :) After I got home, the 3 of us went to Texas Roadhouse for dinner to celebrate. While Troy and I were talking, Stockton managed to sneak Troy's leftover steak off his plate. I think he liked it, dont you?

We spent this past weekend in Boise celebrating Christmas with Troy's family. (Lori, you will have to send me the pics you took) We decorated gingerbread houses and exchanged gifts with everyone. It was a very fun and relaxing weekend. Stockton really cleaned house in the gifts department. He got 2 new trucks, the cutest John Deere camo boots, some new PJs, and bath toys. Seeing him having fun opening gifts is more fun than me getting gifts has ever been.

Those are the main things that have been going on with us. Tonight my family is spending the night at the Marriott downtown to go see the Christmas lights, have dinner, and SWIM!! It should be fun spending some time together. I have tons of pictures of Stockton that I have taken the last couple months. I will try and post some of those soon. Until next time...

Family Pics 09

2009-12-15T05:24:00.007-07:00

I am sure all of my faithful readers (Thanks, Ganny) have been dying for a new post the last month and a half. There has been alot going on and I assure there will be new posts sometime in the future. My lack of posts was initially triggered by my lack of motivation, but now it is supplemented by the loss of my camera. I was hoping I would just stumble on it one day, but now it looks like I am going to have to initiate a full fledged Search and Rescue Mission. What would I do without it once Christmas is here???

Anyways, I thought I could post our family pictures that we had taken last month. A friend of mine is just starting out doing photography and is charging next to nothing so we thought we would take advantage of such an amazing oppurtunity. I thought they turned out GREAT! :)

If any of you are interested in having your own pictures done, let me know I will get you her info. :)

Happy Halloween

2009-11-09T06:04:00.005-07:00

I think this picture pretty much sums up how Stockton felt about Halloween this year. Anytime we put his costume on him he went from a happy baby boy to a sad, pathetic tiger. We thought a tiger would be perfect for him because he likes to growl so much. Maybe he actually wanted to be a lion and was mad at us for getting the animal wrong so he refused to smile or growl in protest.
We hosted a Halloween party at our house the weekend before Halloween so all the cousins could get together and celebrate. The day of the party we decided that we should try and dress up too. Troy put on his army camo and was a GI Joe. The best I could do was a farmer. Boring, I know.

The food turned out really good. We wanted everything to have a Halloween theme. I thought we did a great job not having only sweet, sugary treats.

I made Witches Fingers

And Eyeballs.

Stockton was bored all night long...

It looks like he ALMOST smiled for WeeMa. That's the best he could do.

The weekend of Halloween I surprised Troy with a trip to Idaho to see his family. Can you believe I actually kept it a secret until the day before left??? I am getting good, i know. Our niece's boyfried surprised us with AWESOME seats to the Boise State game. It was alot of fun even though it was a blow out. It was nice to have a day out together without having to worry about Stockton.We had a Halloween party at Scott and Lori's house with yummy chili, carmel apples, homeade rootbeer, and pumkin carving.

Matt and Chantal thought surfing the internet was more fun that carving pumpkins. Boy were they wrong.

Last year I did the Batman logo, so this year I opted for Superman. I figured it was a double whammy since the 'S' could also stand for Stockton. :)

Looking forward to another fun-filled trip to Idaho this weekend! :)

Yes, we are still alive

2009-10-29T08:13:00.007-06:00

Here is the Stockton update for the last few months.

Troy's brother gave Stockton this chair. It is the same chair that all of them grew up sitting in at their grandparents house. I thought it was a pretty cool thing for him to have now. He absolutely loves it. He will just sit in it with the biggest grin on his face and rock back and forth and then turn around and smile at the bear's face. The eyes kind of freak me out when I go into his room at night because they reflect the light from his night light and that's the first thing I see when I walk in.

He still loves taking baths. I think he would stay in the tub all day if I let him.

He has always sported the "hand in the light socket" hair style, but it started to get a little out of control.So, we decided to give him his first haircut. The sides and back are little more controled now, but I dont think there is anything we can do to keep the top from sticking up.
He loves playing in his crib before and after his naptime. It is nice because even after he wakes up, I know that I still have a good 15 minutes before he is ready for me to get him.
He has learned how to pull himself up on the sides. We need to lower his mattress down, but havent gotten around to it yet.

He has 5 teeth now with the 6th starting to poke through. This isnt the best picture but it turns out it isnt very easy to get a picture of all of this teeth at the same time. It was impossible to include his bottom ones, too.
One of his other favorite things is the vacuum cleaner. I think one of his favorite activities is vacuuming the floor. It takes me twice as long to do it now that he likes to chase the vacuum cleaner.
He is starting to go through a Mommy phase. He gets really clingy to me when we are around new people. I wish he wouldnt be so shy, but at the same time I love being his source of comfort.
He is really turning into a Daddy's boy, too. He loves spending time with Dad which is nice for me because then I can get more stuff done. I am lucky to have Troy to give me so much extra time for myself.
Dad's been taking him to car shows.

Teaching him how to work in the garage.

And, teaching him how to ride the skateboard just like him.

The latest development is that Stockton has learned how to crawl this past week!!! Every day he gets faster and faster! This video is from the early stages, he is now a pro!

It wasn't John Stockton, but definitely the next best thing.

2009-10-08T06:40:00.003-06:00

I know I already blogged about our trip to Oklahoma, but I thought this deserved it's own post. While we were at the airport we ran into Jeff Hornacek. It is definately in my top 5 coolest things to ever happen to me list. I walked up to the seats that Troy and my family had chosen to sit in and immediately spotted him no more than 10 feet away from us. He was sitting alone reading the newspaper with no one even staring at him star struck like I was. I debated whether or not to talk to him because I did not want to bother him, but I convinced myself that maybe he has been retired long enough that it would just be an ego boost for him. So I got up the nerve and walked over. I dont remember exactly what was said, but I know it consisted of me telling him how big of a fan I was when he played, that my baby's name was Stockton, and him laughing, probably thinking what a crazy person I was for naming my son Stockton. He was so nice, in fact, I think nice is probably an understatement. Stockton was being a little stinker and wasnt cooperating for the picture, so he played with him and tried to make him happy. In hindsight I wish I would have talked to him more because I know he wouldnt have minded. I was just so nervous and I really didnt want to bother him. But if I ever get the chance again, I will tell him that he was one of the best 3 point shooters in the league, that I loved the way he would wipe his face when he would shoot free throws to say hi to his kids, and that players like him and Stockton are a dying a breed and that I was lucky to grow up having them as role models and teachers of the true game of basketball.

I can't look at these pictures without just smiling from ear to ear. If I didnt know any different, I would think we were just a happy little family sitting at the airport waiting to catch a plane.

O-K-L-A-H-O-M-A!

2009-10-08T05:13:00.006-06:00

For those of you who dont know, I grew up in Oklahoma. We just got back from a recent visit and had a great time. There is nothing like going home and remembering who you are and where you came from. We didnt do a whole lot other than hang out at Ganny's house and play at the corn maze that my stepdad has on his farm. Now that we are home, I have to lose the 5 lbs I gained from all the good food we ate while we were there!!

On the airplane.

Worlds Best BBQ. :)

Hangin out with Gramps on the tractor.

We gave him a glow stick while we were at The Maize and he would NOT let anyone take it away from him!

We spent a day in OKC visiting the bombing memorial and the Botanical Gardens. It was fun visiting some places I hadnt been since I was a kid.

See what happens when Mom gets distracted and looks away for a second.

Going for a walk at Ganny's house.

He wasnt so sure about climbing hay bails.

Cute Stockton with his crazy Dad in the Maize. It was funny because with the humidity in the air, Stockton's hair laid down pretty much the whole time. He looked so different without it sticking up everywhere.

Going through the maize.

I got to visit a good friend from high school and her family. It was nice to catch up.

Stockton and Gramps on another tractor.

Stockton loved taking a bath in the same tub that I bathed in hundreds of times.

Stockton and his Ganny.

We saw this salon and had to take a picture because it reminded us of Troy's mom. We thought it was so funny.

It's Official...I am a Mother

2009-10-08T04:21:00.002-06:00

Stockton has been sick. He puked all over the place several times yesterday evening. Two of those times required baths. Not only for the mess, but the bath tub seemed to be the only place he was happy. He was happily splashing when I noticed a log floating in the water and when I looked for its source, I noticed another one on its way out. This I could have handled with only a minor freak out. But when the solid logs turned to chunky, mucusy diarrhea, I lost it. Troy was out working in the garage and when I called him freaking out to come in, of course he told me I could handle it on my own. So as I am standing there frantic with a panic attack on the verge of puking, Stockton is staring at me wondering what all the fuss is about. I wont go into all the details, but I did survive. The toys, tub, and Stockton all came out clean and sanitary. I have always said I would much rather deal with the teenage years than having to clean up vomit, poop, and pee for years and years and last night reaffirmed that for me. Thank you Stockton for my Official Motherhood Initiation.

This is what happens...

2009-09-10T22:17:00.003-06:00

...when you take Stockton to the Farmer's Market and give him a sweet, juicy peach......let him suck the life out of it......and then take it away from him.

Such a sad, sad story.

Like Mother, Like Son

2009-09-05T08:57:00.004-06:00

Me and Stockton couldnt have posed for these pictures any better if we would have been trying.

What do you think? Does he look like his mother?

My two cents

2009-09-04T15:45:00.005-06:00

I couldnt have said it better myself so I will just let my sister say it for me. Although, I do have to add my own sidenote that I am completely baffled that people are already getting so irate over a speech they havent even heard yet!!! At least give him the chance to succeed at being the role model that his position needs him to be rather than set him up to fail.

http://vanderlindenclan.blogspot.com/2009/09/im-troubled-by-this.html

Disclaimer: Not for the easily offended.

Random thoughts

2009-09-01T09:08:00.006-06:00

I recently had a conversation with a neighbor that led to our age when becoming parents. She is 31 with a 3 year old and a baby Stockton's age. She mentioned that some people have been critical of her for waiting until 27 to have her first baby. She then started telling me about her sisters and some of her friends that got married and started having kids right after high school and have left their husbands so they can experience a fun, single life that they never got to live. She was saying how happy she was that she waited because now everyday with her kids feels like Christmas.

I didnt say much in the conversation, but I knew that I agreed with her. It wasnt until thinking about it later that night that my random thoughts could correctly communicate what I was thinking. This is what I came up with: I am 27 with a young marriage and a new baby and I can honestly say that I dont feel like I am missing out on anything. Obviously there are times that I wish I could just go out to dinner and movies with my friends at the drop of a hat. And go shopping for new clothes without thinking twice. Or even go run errands without having to plan my day around feedings and nap schedules. But when I think about me and Troy as a couple and as parents I realize that we have both experienced alot that life has to offer, not as much as everyone, but more than most, at least in the culture that we live in. We have both experienced love and heartache on a mature level, we have both acheived financial independence that allowed us to experience living on our own and being solely responsible for ourselves, we have both dabbled in a life that all of us are curious about, but most of us are either too disiplined to try or too embarrassed to allow themselves to admit it. We have been able to travel and see parts of the world and country that has opened our eyes to how others live, we have been able to enjoy ample amounts of free time that we could selfishly enjoy however we wanted to, we have both been able to enjoy dating and being single, making good friends and being able to have many fun times with them; while at the same time also experiencing feelings of lonlieness and fear.

Through these experiences and life in general, we have learned the importance of family and a solid support structure, we have figured out who we were and what we wanted in a spouse and what values in life we wanted to live by. We have both ached so badly for the family that at times we never thought we would ever have. So now that we are here, we can both finally exhale and just enjoy it. There hasnt been a day since I have had Stockton that I have felt like I was missing out on life. Am I naive to believe that day will never come? Maybe. But for now, like my neighbor, I will enjoy waking up to Christmas morning everyday.

Hunter's wife? You decide.

2009-08-27T08:41:00.011-06:00

Does this family picture officially make me a hunter's wife?

If so, I guess I can live with that.

Does that mean I want this precious baby boy to grow up being a hunter?

That is still debatable.

Do I really have a choice in the matter?

Doubtful.

We just returned from a successful, week long camping/hunting trip with Troy's brother's family and his Mom and step dad. The hunting aspect was alot more....fun than I thought it would be?....no, I wouldnt say that, but it was definately more exciting than I anticipated. I was happy that Troy was able to get his buck that he has been dreaming about for so long. Him and Scott worked hard and they were successful. Good job boys! :) The camping was definately relaxing even if Stockton did spend most of the week grumpy getting new teeth. I was able to spend some quality time with my niece, sister in law, and mother in law. Time with them is always too short. Here are some pics of the week. Everytime I look at them I just can't believe how much bigger and cuter Stockton gets everyday.

Sidenote to all of Stockton's uncles: You guys really need to step your game. I think Stockton has officially declared Scott his favorite uncle. He is just mesmerized by him everytime we see him.

2nd Annual Walker Family Camp out

2009-08-25T06:06:00.008-06:00

For the second year my entire family spent a few nights at a really Campground in Provo. It was alot of fun again and we look forward to making it a yearly Walker Family tradition. Stockton was a little scared at first, fearing he would be mauled by all of his cousins...

But it didnt take him long to embrace it and become part of the pack...
All of the kids had fun hanging out with each other and spending time with their Aunties and their Weema.

We spent alot of time swimming...

On the drive home we decided to have a picnic and take a short walk up to Bridal Veil Falls since none of us had ever been before. It was the perfect little adventure for a pack of kids...

Of course it didnt take Emily long to go from sweet little girl...

...to adventurous little tomboy....
...by the end of the week, we all felt like this!